Planetbound
Copyright© 2026 by D M Arnold
Chapter 12: I Feel Like I’ve Been Through a War
“Yasuko, it’s Nick,” he called as he walked into the house. He saw George sitting in the living room.
“She stepped out. How’s the consultation going?”
“It’s going well. Did Suki go out, too?”
“No, she’s upstairs.”
“Did Yasuko take Nicky?”
“He’s upstairs also.”
Nyk trotted up the steps to the apartment. He opened the door and saw Suki sleeping in a ball on the sofa. He opened the door to the nursery and looked in. The crib was empty.
He went to Suki and shook her. “Suki... korlyta ... wake up.”
She opened her eyes. “Nick? Oh, Nick, you’re home.” He held her.
“Where’s Nicky?” Suki gave him a blank look. “Suki, where is Nicky?”
“The bathtub!”
Nyk ran into the bathroom. Nicky was lying in the plastic tub that served to bathe him. He was on his back in about two inches of water. Nyk picked him up.
“He’s cold — his lips are blue!” Nyk listened to his chest. “He’s alive.” He grabbed a towel and wrapped the infant. “George! George!” Nyk called down the stairs.
“Yes, Nick?”
“Do we have a heating pad?”
“I’ll bring one up.”
Nyk turned to Suki. “How long was he in there?” She stared at the floor. “Suki, how long was he in there?”
“I ... I don’t know. I was bathing him ... the phone rang ... I must’ve forgotten about him.”
George walked into the apartment with the heating pad. Nyk plugged it in and wrapped it around Nicky.
George shook his head. “I’ll send Yasuko up when she comes in.”
“Didn’t he cry?” Nyk asked.
“I ... I ... Nick, I can’t hear him cry! I tune him out. Do you see what a basket case I am?” She collapsed on the sofa, sobbing.
Nicky’s color began to return. He started shivering and attempted to cry. “Here. Take him.”
“No! I can’t.”
“Take him. I’m going to check downstairs for a bottle.”
“I’ll feed him.” She started to open her gown.
“No.” Nyk returned with a half-filled bottle. He took Nicky and began feeding him. “This is warmer than body temperature — to get some heat into him from the inside.” He held and stroked Nicky as he began to nurse enthusiastically. “He’s starting to warm up. I think he’ll be all right.” Nyk looked at Suki. “Now are you ready to see your doctor?”
“I don’t want to take any drugs. They scare me.”
“This scared ME!”
“I’m afraid of psychoactive drugs. They change things in your brain.”
“You have things wrong in your brain. Changing them is the whole point!”
“Oh, Nick. I’m trying ... Please give me just a little more time.”
Nyk stepped into the kitchen and saw Yasuko. “George told me what happened. We’re so lucky you came home when you did.” She looked into his eyes. “Nick, what happened today ... was exactly what happened to me. Sukiko must’ve been about three months old and I left her in the tub.” Tears ran down her face. “George had me committed the next day.”
“No one’s going to commit Suki. I’ll talk to her about seeing her doctor. If she thinks putting her into a hospital is the right thing, we’ll do it.”
“You have more patience than George.” Nyk held her and kissed her forehead. “I still have mixed feelings about what he did. On the one hand, it was what I needed to heal.” She sobbed. “But, I felt so abandoned!”
“I’m not abandoning Suki,” he said as he stroked her hair. “I’m not leaving her side.”
“Are you having dinner with us?”
“I’ll take a tray upstairs, if that’s okay.”
“Fine, Nick.” She placed some bowls on a bamboo tray and handed it to him.
Nyk carried it upstairs. He found Suki in their bedroom nursing Nicky. “Just finishing up,” she said. He took the baby from her and propped him with pillows between himself and Suki. Nicky smiled at him. He handed her a bowl and chopsticks.
“I am feeling better. I only cried once today.”
Nyk shook his head. “Please don’t deny it. You need to see your doctor.”
“I said I’m feeling better.”
“Suki, after what I came home to — I must insist you make an appointment to see your doctor. You don’t have to see a psychotherapist — I’m sure your obstetrician can help you.”
“Give me a chance, will you?”
“What harm is it to talk to your doctor? Tell her what you’re going through. It’s not your fault, Suki. There’s something wrong with your brain chemistry.”
“I’ll make a deal with you. If I’m not better in a couple of days, I’ll make the appointment. Okay?”
Nyk looked at her. “Okay.” He set the bowls on the tray and carried it to the living room. “I’ll change him and put him downstairs,” he said as he picked up Nicky.
Nyk returned to the bedroom and stretched out on the bed. He slipped his arm around Suki. “It’s sweet of your mom to care for him until you’re feeling better.”
“It’s sweet of her to care for you, too.”
“What do you mean?”
“Oh, you know what I mean. You should be proud of me — I’m holding our relationship to Floran standards, too.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I hope Daddy doesn’t figure it out, though. He has a vicious temper.”
“Suki, you’re not making sense.”
“Don’t try to deny it. You told me you and Mom desire each other.”
“I also told you we’d never approach each other that way. We haven’t.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Suki — I’ve slept downstairs because you needed time by yourself. I’d never lie to you. How can you think Yasuko and I...”
“I see the way she looks at you — and how you look at her — how she always has her hands on you...” She pulled away from him and Nyk could see anger building in her eyes. “No ... I’m not going to let myself be jealous.” He slipped his arm around her again. “Don’t touch me!” She glowered at him. “How could you, Nick? How could you with my mother?”
“I haven’t — we haven’t — I swear, Suki.”
“You’re lying!”
“Why do you think I’d lie to you?”
“Because of what I’ve become — I’m gross and disgusting — a horrible parent. You’d say anything not to upset me.”
“Suki, this is ludicrous. I can’t believe you’re jealous of something you imagine I did.”
“I’m not imagining.”
“Then, you’re hallucinating.”
“Now, you’re trying to goad me. You want me to lose it so you can call in the men in the white coats.” She clenched her fist and glared at him.
“No, Suki. I want you the way you were. That’s why I think you should see your doctor.”
She slapped his face. “I don’t want to hear you say the word doctor again!”
Nyk hopped off the bed. “Suki!”
“Get out of here!” Nyk backed up against the bedroom wall. “I said, get out!” She grabbed the alarm clock from the nightstand and threw it in his direction. Nyk ducked, but the clock hit him above the temple. He felt his injury and saw blood on his fingers.
He opened the closet, took down a cardboard carton and removed a Floran first-aid kit. He opened it and took out a clear bottle with a dropper.
“Such drama.” she sneered.
“Look,” he said and showed her the gash on his head. “I’m going to put some salve on it. He stepped into the bathroom and applied healing salve to the cut.
Nyk returned to the bedroom to replace the kit. He looked at her with tears in his eyes. “If you can’t see something’s wrong ... I’ve turned my back on the Agency, I’m up to my neck in trouble with homeworld authorities. My transit here may incite an interplanetary colonial incident. I’ve left my wife, quit my job — I’ve done all this for one purpose, and that’s to be with you and to help you raise Nicky. You’re sick, Suki — and when you’re sick, you go to the doctor to help yourself get better. If you want to get better, call for an appointment — or I’ll call for you. If you don’t want to get better ... I’ll talk to your folks about what we can do with Nicky. Now, I’m going to ask your mother if it’s okay to use the guest room.” He headed for the door.
“Wait, Nick. Okay, make the appointment. They’ll probably want to lock me up. I hope they do — I deserve it, and it’ll get me out of here.” She flopped on the bed and sobbed.
Nyk stepped off the city bus and walked into the medical arts building. “Now, tell the doctor the truth. Tell her what you’ve been going through. Don’t hold anything back. We all need you, Suki. I’ll promise you this — we’re not going to lock you up or abandon you.”
“What if she thinks I need to be locked up?”
“I don’t think you’re that bad. If she thinks you could benefit from time away, we’ll see what we need to do. Promise me you’ll be straight with her.”
“I promise.”
Nyk sat beside Suki in the waiting room. He heard the nurse call her name and watched her head toward an examining room. He picked up a magazine and flipped through it. Suki returned and slapped a slip of paper onto his lap. “Anti-depressants. I hope you’re happy.”
“I’m not.”
“She wants to speak with you.”
Nyk accompanied her into the doctor’s private office. “Mr Kane. Please sit down. I understand you and Sukiko are engaged.” Nyk nodded. “She’s suffering from about as severe a case of post-partum depression as I can recall. Is someone at home to help care for her baby?”
“Yes. We live in the apartment above her parents’ house. Her mother can help her with Nicky, and I’m working part-time. There’ll be someone with her around the clock.”
“Good. I won’t bother to pass this case on to Social Services, then. I am tempted to refer her to a psychotherapist, but we’ll try the anti-depressants first.”
“We were afraid she’d need to go to an institution.”
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