A Walk Through the Night

THERE’S NO WAY YOU COULD POSSIBLY DESCRIBE THIS. One foot after the other. Rock walls rising black on either side, a chasm of stars. The road like a gray snake winding through cold air. Night.

WHEN YOU’RE READING A BOOK ... YOU’RE ALWAYS SAFE INSIDE YOUR MIND. THERE ARE WALLS AND WARMTH AROUND YOU. THERE’S NO WAY YOU CAN FEEL EXPOSED, LIKE THIS. The sound of shoes on pavement. A chill sweat. THIS WEAKNESS. IT PUTS YOU IN A DIFFERENT WORLD, MAKES YOUR MIND FEEL ... STRETCHED. This weakness. It puts you in a different world, makes your mind feel ... stretched. Convulsed stride and a kind of shudder. DAMN.

WHY AM I ALWAYS EXPOSED LIKE THIS? ALL THOSE YEARS, DON’T THEY MEAN ANYTHING? Hunger and cold. MAYBE I COULD WRITE A STORY ... WOULD THAT MAKE IT ANY BETTER? A sound to my right. The same fear again.

YOU CAN’T KNOW UNTIL YOU’VE FELT THESE THINGS. I ALWAYS THOUGHT I WAS GOING SOMEWHERE. NOWHERE BUT THIS ROAD. Another shudder from the cold. Chills again. DAMN IT. DAMN IT!

“Save your strength.”

I’VE STILL GOT A LONG WAY TO GO.