Clinging to Hope as the World Falters
Copyright© 2016 by Vincent Berg
07: Making Sure Everyone Is OK
“You know, you could have stayed inside, talked with Linda and gotten everyone ready to leave later,” David told Ellen as he helped her over a steeper section of the trail in the dim pre-dawn light. “I figured the two of you would have had plenty to talk about this morning.”
She scrambled up beside him and they both looked back at Alice, who seemed to be having problems. David assumed it was because she stayed up too late kibitzing with her friends. He’d warned her, and she was normally pretty good about things like that, but he knew she was different with her friends than she was when she was visiting him, so he wasn’t overly surprised.
“Ha, you may get a lot of things with me, but don’t expect a Happy Suzie Homemaker,” Ellen responded. Her face was the opposite of Alice’s, positively beaming in the predawn glow, whereas Alice’s was stuck in a persistent scowl. “I’m not exactly a terrible cook, but I’ve never spent a lot of time in the kitchen. Being on my own for so long, I’ve always focused on other things than cooking and cleaning. I can make do, but all things being considered I’d just rather not bother.”
David laughed; he could understand such an attitude. Ellen really seemed to enjoy the outdoors, and having gotten used to the climb to the wind turbine, she was keeping up with them. In fact she was doing better than Alice, since she seemed to be dragging so much that morning.
“Well, if the other kids are like Alice is this morning, I’m sure Linda could use all the help she can get. Those girls are going to be hard to get moving today.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t worry about it. She’s got plenty of help, and the girls are excited. They’re glad to be out of danger and are interested in what’s happening.”
“Then why was Alice up all night?” David asked, not quite comprehending the supposedly clear signals his daughter was sending him.
“Actually, that’s the main reason I came along with you this morning. I was hoping to protect you.”
“Protect me? From what? I know this route like the back of my hand and the meteors shouldn’t start until this afternoon.”
Ellen smiled at him. For as wonderful as he was, sometimes he could be a little slow. She took his arm in hers and turned back so they could both watch Alice slowly walk up behind them, glaring at her father the entire way.
“From her,” she told him.
David shook his head. “Huh? What do you ... Wait, what am I missing? What’s she angry about?”
Alice was almost up to them and Ellen didn’t want to make anything worse by saying the wrong thing, so she just added, “Think about it.”
David did. Alice stopped before she reached them, still staring at her father. He shrugged and started up the hill, trying to figure out what was going on. He climbed for a couple of minutes before he stopped dead, turning around to glance between Alice and Ellen.
“She didn’t?” he asked, hoping to not hear the response he expected.
“She did,” she answered him simply.
“Alice, were you sitting outside our room again last night?” he called, concerned that Alice might still be too troubled to sleep at night.
“She didn’t hear you last night. Well, technically she did, but she didn’t put it together then. She followed me downstairs after I left the girls alone, and confronted me.”
“And you told her?” David asked, astounded at how Ellen reacted around children.
“She figured it out herself,” she told him.
David turned and regarded his daughter again. She’d caught up to them again and was currently standing there watching him.
“Alice, it’s not what you think,” he tried to tell her.
“No, it’s not what you think,” she told him with venom to her voice. “This has got to be the stupidest thing you’ve ever done.”
“Stupidest?” he asked in confusion. He’d been sure she was going to get her hopes up about his reconciling with his ex-wife.
“Yes, the stupidest. You’ve been miserable for years now. You’ve lived as a solitary emotional cripple, and just when I think you may be getting back on your feet, you backslide right back where you were years ago.”
“I ... I don’t understand,” he replied, glancing back and forth between Ellen and Alice.
“She’s not fond of the idea of the two of you being together,” Ellen informed him.
“But I thought—”
“Yes, we figured that much out,” she told him, holding his cheek like he was a slow remedial student trying to figure out an algebra equation.
“You and Mom are a mistake,” Alice insisted. “You were an emotional cripple for years after the two of you broke up. I figured getting you and Ellen together might help you adjust finally, but like they say, you take one step forward then run crying to your mother. Or rather my mother,” Alice replied angrily.
“Alice, it isn’t like that,” he tried to argue, using the same argument despite having found himself in a different battle.
“No? Then what’s it like? You and Mom slept together, didn’t you? Mom spent all night flirting with you, didn’t she? You’ve been acting like you’re walking on a cloud all morning, haven’t you?”
“No, no, that’s not what I meant. I mean that your mom and I aren’t getting back together.”
“You aren’t?” Alice asked, surprised.
“No. It isn’t like I don’t like her,” he hurried to add. “After all, we had fun, but we got together just because she was feeling lost and wanted some comfort. Some physical comfort,” he said, trying to get her to understand what happened without having to spell it out for her. “Like when you came to our bed the other night. She was doing the same thing. It didn’t mean anything. She just wanted to be held, and I, well...”
“I actually arranged it,” Ellen explained. “She asked me if she could, telling me it would only be a onetime thing, and I agreed thinking it might be good for your father, possibly helping him get over his hang-up over her once and for all.”
“Really?” Alice asked, smiling for the first time that morning.
“Really,” David assured her. “We’re not getting back together. You’re stuck with Ellen and me, because I’m not about to give her up now that I’ve found her.”
“Now that’s good news,” Alice replied, wrapping an arm around them both and pushing them up the hill so they could finish their project and get back before the morning got too late. “Wait a minute,” she asked, pulling up short. “What about Mom? Does she know this was only a onetime thing?”
“I just said she only asked me for a single visit with your father,” Ellen reminded her.
“That doesn’t mean she isn’t assuming something else,” Alice countered.
“I’m sure she’s not planning anything,” David insisted.
“Well, we hope so anyway,” Ellen added. “We were planning to get together and hash it out this morning. We figured we’d do it when we left today, the three of us in a car together with no way out until we get to where we’re going. I figured that way we’d figure out if anyone is harboring any resentment over what happened last night.”
“If you weren’t getting together, then why risk it?” Alice asked. Not an unreasonable question.
“It’s one of those weird adult things,” David replied unconvincingly. “Frankly, I’m not sure I understand it myself.”
“Well, I still think it’s a stupid idea, and I hope you’re correct, but I’ll be anxious until this is over. Now let’s finish up here so you two can get back and talk to Mom,” Alice replied, pushing them back uphill.
Everyone seemed to be having a good time when they returned. The girls were giggling and talking a mile-a-minute, the women were busy keeping the food fresh and removing used plates, while Bobby was cleaning up the dirty dishes, earning the respect and gratitude of the women.
“So the heroes return, having kept us protected with continuing power and other luxuries,” Linda said when they entered. “We saved you some food warming in the oven. Sit down and eat up, since I know you’re anxious to get moving.”
“Oh, are we heading out today?” Caitlyn asked excitedly.
“Yeah, we’d love to go see what things look like outside,” Julie agreed. “I was so busy trying not to throw up from the pain yesterday, that I had trouble paying attention to what was happening.”
“You can leave me out of it. I saw enough death and destruction to last me a lifetime,” Erica said.
“Well, we only have a single vehicle today since Betts and Ma are heading into town, so there really isn’t room for anyone else,” David warned them. “It’s just Ellen, Linda and me. I’d like the rest of you to look over the buildings and land outside to see how much damage we suffered last night. Maggie can help you make any repairs that are necessary, since she’s pretty capable with a hammer and a saw. Bobby, I don’t know how much you know about cars, but I figured you might be the best to see if you can make some basic repairs to the cars Linda and Betts were driving last night. I’m thinking it’ll be mostly banging out the dents and determining what works and what doesn’t.”
“Sounds good, we can manage that,” Maggie told him.
“Bob’s going to need help,” Amy said. “I’d be glad to help him. I’m fairly good with mechanical things. I’ve helped my brother fix dings he put in my dad’s car often enough to know my way around them.”
“That makes sense, especially since the others don’t know where anything is or how to deal with downed trees,” Alice said. “I figure Mom doesn’t either, so I figured I’d better go with you, too, especially since there’s enough room in the SUV for one more.”
David and Linda looked at her in shock, but Ellen just shook her head with a small smile on her face she tried to hide.
“Uh, we were hoping...” David said, not sure how to finish his objection.
“We might run into some things you really shouldn’t see,” Linda replied, thinking of something more specific than David could.
“Like dead bodies? Mom, I saw several, and I helped drag them out of a collapsed house. I can deal with it. But I’d be better at crawling through storm damaged buildings than you would be, and I’m used to working with Dad, so I’m the best person to help him with any trouble you may encounter.”
Linda looked at her, her mouth opening and closing as she tried to figure out some objection to bring up but finding none. David tried to reason with her, since he knew she was aware of why they wanted their time alone.
“We were hoping to use the time to discuss how to handle the accommodations. We only have limited supplies, so we have to figure out how to allocate things, plus your mom isn’t sure how long she wants to stay here.”
Alice looked him dead in the eyes as she replied to him. “I know what’s here plus where to find replacements, I also know what each of the girls is likely to eat, as well as their personalities and what they’ll be like after spending a week in the country locked away in a cabin. Besides,” she said with a triumphant smile, “I’ve got as much interest in what you decide as anyone. I can help with the discussion.”
David took his turn imitating a goldfish until Ellen took control for him. “That’s OK, as long as you sit quietly in the back and let the adults discuss things on their own. You don’t say anything unless you’re asked your opinion, understood?”
“Yes, ma’am,” Alice replied with a grin. Alice’s friends looked at her in confusion, figuring there was more going on here than it appeared but not sure quite what it was.
“You girls ever cut up a tree before?” David asked. “I’m sure there are a lot of downed trees that need to be cleared away.”
“Really?” Amy asked with a sparkle in her eyes. “Could we use the chain saw?”
“Maybe I’d better handle the chainsaw,” Bobby suggested.
“Over my dead body,” Ma replied. “No one’s going to let a blind man wave a chainsaw around. Those things are dangerous and people injure themselves every day.”
“She’s got a good point. If anyone uses the chainsaw it’ll be Maggie,” David informed them. “The rest of you can help by holding and moving logs for her, but make sure you stay out of the way of the blade. I’ll bet this will be an education you won’t get in school.”
Everyone climbed into the SUV but no one wanted to say anything, being aware of Alice sitting anxiously in the back seat. David put the car in gear and drove off as Alice waved to her friends who were cleaning up the scattered broken branches lying around the yard. No one said anything until the car was well beyond the tree line.
“You can talk now,” Alice said to the silent car. “I know what happened, so you’re not going to shock me.”
“This would be much easier if you weren’t listening in,” her mother replied.
“Hey, I’m here to make sure each of you don’t do anything stupid. Just consider me your advocate, I’m here to watch out for you.”
“Where did you learn about advocates?” Linda asked with amusement in her voice.
“Hey, I’m not that young. I know a lot of stuff,” she replied, then waited a while before adding, “but Caitlyn told me about it. I knew what I wanted to do but I didn’t know the right word for it.”
“Remember what I said,” Ellen reminded her. “No intruding in the conversation. Let us work this out between us. This is between us. You’re here for information purposes only. When we’re finished we’ll discuss our positions with you, but we don’t want you interrupting. We’re likely to say several things you don’t agree with, but we need the freedom to explore all the options. OK?”
“Yeah,” Alice grumbled, agreeing but not sounding happy about it.
“I take it she’s not overly fond about what we did?” Linda asked David and Ellen, looking between them. “Just how much does she know?”
Ellen turned and looked at Alice. She just looked right back, not answering. “OK, you’re allowed to respond to that. Just don’t get angry when one of us says something stupid.” That seemed to please Alice so she went ahead.
“I noticed that Ellen didn’t seem anxious to return to Dad’s bedroom, so I followed her out to ask her about it. When I stopped outside Dad’s room I heard some embarrassing sounds, but I knew she didn’t have enough time to get that far, so I went downstairs looking for her.”
“How do you know how long it takes to make ‘embarrassing sounds’?” Linda asked in her ‘concerned mother’ voice.
“Alice agreed to be reasonable about our discussion,” Ellen reminded everyone. “I think it’s only fair if we return the favor. She obviously knows enough, so let’s just leave it at that.”
Linda grunted but didn’t say anymore.
“I didn’t think much of it, thinking it was just random noise or maybe the TV, so I went downstairs looking for Ellen.”
David thought about reminding her that he never really watched television at night, but he didn’t think that was a good point to bring up at the moment.
“When I found her, we started talking. She said she was ‘giving Dad some space’, which I thought was suspicious. But it was only when we’d been talking for a while that I put it all together. That was when she admitted that you were sleeping with Dad. I got upset at all of you, her mostly because I thought she was throwing away a good thing, but she told me to wait until today and that you’d explain it all to me. So now I’m waiting for you to convince me you didn’t screw up a great thing.”
“That wasn’t the response I was expecting from her,” David told his ex. “I’d thought she was upset we weren’t moving in together right away.”
“That’s not why—” she started to argue before Ellen’s glare warned her to be quiet.
“I’m curious about why she’s upset about it?” Linda said as she turned to look back at Ellen, who’d given her the passenger seat mostly so she could run interference between her and her daughter.
Ellen could see Alice getting ready to respond so she put her hand on her arm to calm her.
“She thinks you’re getting involved would hurt David,” Ellen responded. “That it took him years to get over the breakup and that I was the first girl he ever took seriously and that you stepping in now is likely to put him into a tailspin.”
Linda looked thoughtful before she responded. “I can see that, I guess. I hadn’t realized he hadn’t wanted the divorce until he mentioned it last night. I always assumed since he didn’t object to it that he was fine with it.”
“Would you have changed anything if I had?” David asked her honestly. She frowned.
“No, I guess I wouldn’t have.” David simply grunted, showing that was exactly what he’d thought and why he hadn’t said anything at the time.
“I’d just like to take this opportunity to apologize, and to say that I’m sorry for all the things I may have said about you.” David waved her off, though whether in forgiveness or simply because he didn’t want to listen to it no one was sure.
“Did you say many bad things about him?” Ellen asked, simply because she thought someone should ask it. Alice harrumphed in the back seat, establishing her position but the others ignored her interruption.
“I’m embarrassed to say that I did. I complained about him to everyone I knew. To my friends, to our friends, to both our families and to Alice as well.” She took a moment to gather herself. “But now that I see how you’ve adapted and how much you’ve accomplished, I think I’ve changed my mind. I’m also beginning to see your position now that I’m away from everyone that echoed my own.”
“All right, before we get maudlin, let’s address Alice’s question,” Ellen said, interrupting her. “What are your feelings about David after you’ve had some time to think about it?”
“Gee, it’s embarrassing to say this in front of your daughter, especially when you know she already disapproves,” she replied.
“You’ll get over it. I told her she couldn’t interrupt so just ignore her. We won’t make any progress unless we can be honest with each other,” Ellen reminded them.
“You’re right,” Linda responded. “OK, here goes. First, let me just say that last night was wonderful,” she said, to which David blushed, but she went on. “It reminded me of everything we had that we’ve lost, and I’ll admit that I hadn’t realized just how much I’ve missed it.” Alice groaned in the back but no one called her on it.
“I’ll also admit that if things were different, if you weren’t already involved and if I was meeting him again for the first time, that I just may decide to see where things went.”
Alice leaned forward as if to say something but Ellen held her in place.
“She’s got to be free to be honest. She’s just telling us how she felt, not what she plans to do, so let her speak her mind.” Alice nodded and sat back again, placated for the moment.
“So do you have any plans to pursue a relationship with David?” Ellen asked, mainly to calm Alice more than anything else, even though she was dying to hear the answer. But she knew the initial answer would be mainly directed at appeasing everyone, and wouldn’t likely be an honest answer anyway.
“No, absolutely not. I think too much of you, David and Alice to step into the middle of everything and screw up everyone’s life, but...” she answered before hesitating, letting her unspoken words hang in the silence of the car.
“But... ?” Ellen prompted her.
“Well, I hope you don’t mind, but I wouldn’t object to being able to flirt with him some more. Speaking honestly, he’s still pretty damn sexy, and I figure some innocent teasing won’t hurt anyone too much.”
“That sounds fair,” Ellen said noncommittally.
“So we haven’t heard from you, yet, David,” Linda reminded him. “What was your response to last night?”
“Well, I was surprised by how strong my feelings were towards her, something I never would have realized if Ellen hadn’t pushed us together. But the important thing is, as wonderfully as we get along, I’m not about to abandon Ellen for you, especially if I don’t trust how long this new attitude of yours is likely to last.” Alice gave a silent thumbs up in the back seat, but no one beside Ellen noticed it.
“OK, so you won’t ‘abandon me’, but that doesn’t really answer the question,” Ellen pushed him for a clearer answer. “How do you feel about what happened last night?”
“It was insightful, and I think ultimately it was healing. What’s more Linda seemed like a completely different person, like the woman I first married.” Linda smiled at that confession and reached over and held his hand on the steering wheel.
“I was hardly a woman when we first married,” she reminded him. “We were both young and carefree before I got obsessed with status and position.”
“You’ll always be...” David started to respond before catching himself. Considering the reaction of the other passengers in the car he didn’t finish the sentiment. But Linda smiled in acknowledgement of the unsaid compliment, so he was satisfied she at least knew what he was thinking.
“OK, but again, ignoring what you feel obligated to say, what did you take away from last night?” Ellen prompted.
“That as nice as it was, and as much as I continue to love my ex-wife, that I’m still committed to this new relationship, and that I’m not going to jeopardize it in any way.” David thought he was in the clear with that response. And he was until Ellen asked her next question.
“And if I wasn’t in the picture? What would you do if we got in a fight and I stormed off on you?”
David didn’t look pleased. He ground his teeth and thought about how best to reply but he was saved by a fallen tree lying across the road. So he stopped the car and got out without answering.
He climbed out, walking around the tree examining it while the others got out. While Ellen and Linda looked on, Alice went into the back of the car and extracted the spare chainsaw and a couple of bow saws she knew he’d have there. As she carried them to him Linda spoke up.
“You’re not getting out of this so easily, buster. What’s your answer?”
David looked back pleadingly, as if asking Alice whether she couldn’t have been faster, but he knew it would take a few minutes to ensure the chainsaw was ready. ‘Damn chainsaw, ‘ he thought to himself, but he stopped to consider how he’d respond as he set about preparing it.
“That’s not an easy nor a fair question,” he responded.
“Maybe not, but it’s the only sensible one,” Linda reminded him. “So what would you do if Ellen wasn’t here to influence you?”
David looked up at Linda and looked her full in the eyes. “I still wouldn’t do it. We’ve lost our trust in each other, and I couldn’t be sure you’d feel any differently once you got back home. You seem different now, but there’s no guaranteeing you’ll feel any more kindly to me once things return to normal in your life.” With that he stood up and started the chainsaw, effectively ending the conversation for the next twenty minutes.
Once they got back underway Linda turned back to regard Ellen. “OK, we’ve heard from David and I, what about you, Ellen? What would you have done if I had said that I was still interested in David?” She asked this with a smile on her face, intending it mainly as a way of allowing Ellen a chance to reconfirm her new commitment to her ex. She figured that was just a small payback for the favor that Ellen had allowed her.
Ellen didn’t have to think about her response before she responded. “Frankly I’d fight like hell to keep David to myself. I’m not about to give him up at this point. The only reason why I agreed to our arrangement was because I could commiserate with what you were going through and you convinced me this was a onetime only thing.”
“What does ‘commiserate’ mean?” Alice asked.
“It means she can relate to it, that she can understand how she feels,” David explained to his daughter.
Linda’s smile grew bigger as she delivered her next response. “And what if I didn’t plan to steal him away? What about if I just wanted to share him?”
“Share him?” Ellen asked, clearly thrown off her game.
“Yeah, what if I wasn’t interested in keeping him for myself. I wouldn’t want to displace you, you’d still be the top dog, as it were, but what if I was willing to pick up your crumbs?”
“Eww!” Alice said with a gagging motion.
“I didn’t mean anything kinky, young lady,” Linda informed her daughter. “I’m just curious how Ellen would respond if it wasn’t so cut and dried?”
Ellen had to think about this one a little more carefully. “I really can’t answer that easily. It would depend on a lot of things. I wouldn’t even consider it if I suspected that you weren’t serious, or that you might change your mind at some point. I only agreed to it because you seemed to be serious about not wanting to come between us.”
“Fair enough,” Linda replied, not really interested in pursuing the matter. She’d asked the question just to be difficult. Although she was now seeing her ex in a new light, she wasn’t sure she was ready to change her entire life in pursuit of something that hadn’t worked the last time.
At this point they’d left David’s private drive and reentered the local road that led to it. There were several houses located here. Not a lot, but a few grouped together. David and Alice looked over them to see just how much damage they’d suffered during the two days of meteor storms. It didn’t look good. One house was completely gone, burned so badly that only the blacked framework was left standing, the other two looked damaged but were still standing, but David was sure there’d been a fourth. He was proved right when he saw at the end of the block the crumpled remains of a house that had collapsed in on itself. He was so busy watching the house that he was shocked when someone ran directly in front of the car.
Linda screamed and David quickly slammed on his brakes, glad he’d noticed the person in time to respond. The tires squealed, but it was kept to a minimum by the antilock brakes, but the car broke to the side as David yanked the steering wheel to avoid a collision. Everyone was a bit stunned, having had to brace themselves unexpectedly, but at least they hadn’t hit anything.
The figure that had run in front of them, a young woman, had been waving her arms to get their attention. Now she ran around the car to David’s window where she proceeded to knock repeatedly on the window. David didn’t have long to consider her, but she looked a bit of a mess. She was wearing a nightgown, but one that was badly torn and covered in smeared blood across the front. Her hair was a mess too, with long straight red hair strung out all around her, but that was understandable given the rest of her look.
Despite his tendency to respond cautiously to someone who looked so out of it demanding something from him, David rolled his window down to see what the problem was.
“You’ve got to help me,” she said, speaking excitedly, hardly pausing to take a breath. “My parents are dead, my sister died in my arms and I can’t find my brother. Everything we had is gone, the house is a mess and I can’t find anything.”
David heard the other doors of the vehicle open as he tried to calm the woman. “Take a deep breath and relax. Lead us to the house and we’ll take a look around,” he instructed her as Ellen and Linda gathered around her, getting her to step back from David’s door so he could get out of the car.
“I doubt you’ll find anything,” she told them. “As I said, most everyone is dead and my brother is simply gone. What I really need is assistance. I have no money, no food or clothing, and I’ve got nowhere to go. I figure the banks are closed so I can’t get any money, and I couldn’t find the car keys to go anywhere. Besides, I’ve really got nowhere else to go. I’m lost and out of options,” she said, starting to break down now that her initial panic seemed to be fading.
“Look, let’s see if we can help you locate your brother, then we’ll discuss helping you. We were on our way to the police station anyway, so we can—”
“No, I don’t need that kind of help. The police haven’t been by, so I doubt they’ll have the time to help, and I’m too old to worry about custody. What I need is someone to help me survive until the banks and stores open. I figure it will take weeks before they can confirm that my family is dead and issue a death certificate, so I’m not going to be able to gain access to my money, so I need—”
“Look, we’ll work all that out, but right now let’s concentrate on your family. Can you show us where everyone was?”
The woman, a girl really, led them to the scattered remains of the house that had once stood there. David noted that the woman had no shoes, stepping carefully around the various obstructions. He also noticed the torn nightgown she had, and the fact that it revealed she was only wearing a slim pair of panties under it. He tried to keep his eyes forward, though, not wanting to be accused of leering at someone who’d suffered so much.
“I was downstairs when there was a loud crack and the whole thing came down,” she explained, as she pointed to one corner of the mass of broken timbers and jumbled belongings. “I was in the kitchen getting a drink, we were all downstairs because we were so worried about the storm. I guess the kitchen was a little safer than the rest of the house. It looks like the whole house fell away from the kitchen, because I escaped relatively unscathed. I dug and dug and I found my mom and dad, but it looked like they’d died instantly. My sister was a mess and she died in my arms. I’ve been looking for my little brother ever since, but I haven’t been able to find him.”
To read the complete story you need to be logged in:
Log In or
Register for a Free account
(Why register?)
* Allows you 3 stories to read in 24 hours.