15: One Girl’s Views and a Little Family Time

In order to best convey Alex’s official history, I’m going to intrude into the story in my role as ‘official biographer’ once more to introduce one last voice, that of one of the more hard to fathom people in this whole endeavor, Alex’s sister, Cate. Many people have trouble understanding how a sister could be so enamored of her older brother, yet still have such problems showing and relating to him. She’s a complex figure and her inner psyche isn’t readily apparent. What’s more, understanding her will show an aspect of Alex that hasn’t been seen yet. In order to do that, I’ll report the proceedings of a private discussion she had with several of Alex’s women, when they gathered to help pack the women’s things for their trip to join Alex. It reveals a lot about her and her motivations, but it’s impossible to tell from Alex’s perspective, as I’m not sure he was ever aware of the details she confided to those present.

So here is Cate’s tale, as told to those closest to Alex, in her own voice. (Note: The next scene occurs the previous day while Alex was visiting with Peter, David and Darice.)

The women gathered in Natalie’s tiny three room apartment. While Alex’s parents set out to work on the facilities, getting things into and out of storage, making repairs and other necessities, the women settled into packing her belongings while talking amongst themselves.

“So Cate, tell us a little more about yourself,” Patricia encouraged. “We’ve spent as much time with you as we have Alex, but we still don’t know much about you other than you like science and that you’re smart as a whip.”

“There’s really not much to tell,” Cate demurred distractedly as she tried to fit one more cup into the box she was packing. “Although I was more social than Alex, I was so focused on my studies that I didn’t get out much.” She stopped, looked up and shrugged. “I’m really a little science homebody.”

“I don’t believe that for a minute,” Rebecca answered, grinning at her. Most of the girls had taken the day off to help each other prepare for their combined departures. “There’s clearly a lot behind that busy little mind of yours. I’ve noticed that you’re dedicated to your brother, and it’s not because of your ‘scientific’ interest in his new abilities, because you clearly felt that way before any of this first occurred.”

“Yeah, that’s true. If you all really want to know, I’ll tell you a little story. Just promise it won’t go any farther than this room, OK?” she asked, looking from one to the other trying to get a personal agreement from each one. They all quickly agreed, anxious to exchange a little juicy gossip, even if none of them could share it with anyone else. Like much of their recent lives, they had much to discuss but no one outside of the immediate group would ever understand any of it. That was part of what helped cement their relationships with each other. It’s hard to relate to family when you can’t tell them the most important thing ever to happened to you. It’s hard to relate to friends when you can’t honestly confide in them. That’s also why the girls hadn’t told many of their friends and family about what their plans were.

“I’ve always been close to Alex,” Cate continued as she busied herself packing her box with rolled up balls of paper to prevent the breakable items from shifting. “I mean, he’s my older brother and I always idolized him. We were nearly the same age and I always wanted him to take me places and protect me.”

“That’s the way it is for many siblings,” Natalie agreed.

“Yeah, my two kids are the same way,” Brooke added, nodding her head. “Peter is always protecting Suzy, and she idolizes him for it.”

“Well, the thing you don’t know... , “ she paused, grunting at the effort required to lift the heavy set of dishes she’d been packing in order to move it to the corner, “is that I had reasons to idolize him other than just being his younger sister.” She deposited the box with the others then returned and sat down again before continuing, causing the others to hang on her promise of an exclusive detail about her and Alex.

“Much like all of you were able to detect other’s emotional states, and just like each of you could detect whatever it is about Alex that drew you to him, I too felt Alex’s power draw me in. Only in my case I never detected it as any kind of power,” she explained, getting to work on the assembled mismatch of silverware. “Instead, I just knew that I could always go to him whenever I had a problem,” she continued. “It started when I’d get scared of storms or monsters late at night. I’d never bother my parents. Instead I’d leave my sisters behind and seek refuge in Alex’s room.” They all looked at her with an odd mix of understanding and curiosity. Although each had felt a similar attraction to her brother, none of them were quite familiar with what she had experienced as a child, long before Alex had supposedly developed any of his newfound abilities.

“There was just something about him that I always found reassuring,” Cate continued, wrapping the spoons up, occasionally glancing up at the others at random, as if gauging how they were reacting to her tale, looking like she’d stop immediately if any of them called her on it. It was clear that this was something she’d never revealed to anyone before. “Whenever he’d hold me I’d feel safe and secure. Like nothing in the world could possibly harm me. I’ve never felt that way with anyone else. If push came to shove I might go to my father if Alex wasn’t home, but it was never the same. Sure, he could protect us if someone was to break into the house or something, but he couldn’t protect me from whatever scared me the way Alex could. Alex would take whatever fear I felt, no matter the source, and just make it disappear whenever he’d wrap his arms around me.” Everyone sighed at this romantic notion, so much so that they all fell into a brief shared laughter together.

“Do you think it could have been an early sign of his power?” Anh asked with a sparkle in her eye, although it had to be translated. Cate was used to getting the best questions from her, and clearly respected her opinion. Especially recently, as she’d come to rely on her for support since she’d been having trouble relating to Alex.

“I’m really not sure,” she confessed, putting her collected forks down as she considered it, tilting her head as she did so. “I’m tempted to say yes, but there were no other signs of any mysterious powers in our lives. I’d always just thought I’d been able to relate to him, more than I could anyone else.” She finally shook her head, as if clearing it of the memories she couldn’t locate. “I always respected my older sisters, especially Becky, once she started to advance in her math and science studies and decided to get her doctorate. But it was always Alex who spurred me on. He always made me feel so secure at home that I felt I had enough to spare, that I could accomplish anything I wanted. That’s what made the sciences so easy for me when most girls are terrified of the math involved. He’d just come into the room while I’d be struggling with trying to figure out my math homework and give me a quick hug and suddenly it didn’t seem scary anymore. Just like that. Just one quick hug and everything in life was manageable.”

Cate got back to wrapping the forks and carefully placing them into the box with the other silverware. “When I thought I was unattractive he made me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world. When I felt spoilt he made me want to share everything I had with him. When I felt petty he’d make me feel foolish for spoiling his good mood. Every little thing he could solve with nothing more than a simple, momentary hug. If an older girl was bullying me, he’d listen to me complain, give me a little squeeze, and suddenly I’d just know that there was no way anyone could possibly best me. Sure, they might be bigger or meaner than I was, but I’d always manage to think of some way of getting back at them or of working things out. It all seemed like magic to me, but a magic so ordinary I never thought of it as anything other than normal.”

“You know, that’s the way that I feel around Alex, even if we don’t touch,” Brooke revealed. “Just standing near him fills me with confidence, energy and vitality.” There were nods and confirmations all around.

“Even I feel something similar when I’m around him,” Natalie said. “It’s never quite as identifiable, but I just feel more alive around him than I do when I’m with anyone else.”

“The same with me,” Rebecca agreed. “That’s why I immediately jumped in to help him. I didn’t have any idea he was magical, I just saw him as a guy who made me feel comfortable and who I could trust implicitly.”

“Yeah, being around him just seems to melt away any feelings of insecurity, awkwardness or even any potential jealousies,” Shani said with a far-away look in her eyes. Her eyes suddenly came alive as she turned to the others. “You know, I suspect we get along despite our many differences because of that. I mean, it’s not like we don’t have any conflicts with one another. It’s because Alex’s presence seems to melt those conflicts away. You just feel honored to be in his presence, in whatever circumstance it happens to be. Even if you’re lying in a nearby bed watching him have sex with someone else, you feel good about it. Not only do you know that you’ll eventually have your own turn, but he’s just so emotionally rich that he can share such delight with others that we’ll all come out the better for it.” The others sat stunned at that idea, then one by one nodding in agreement with it. It was then they began to appreciate what might just be his strongest ability of all.

“When I didn’t develop along with the other girls, he made me feel more special than all of them put together,” Cate continued. “When I felt I wasn’t as pretty as anyone else, I felt that no one else mattered, just as long as I was pretty enough for him. Hell, even when I had my first menstrual cramps, I went to him instead of my mother. He simply held me and asked me what was wrong. Instantly the pain just drifted away and I could relax again. Of course I was too embarrassed to tell him what was bothering me. Luckily I had lots of older sisters to give me the lowdown on all the details, and a sympathetic mother who’d instructed plenty of other daughters so there weren’t any unnecessary questions. But everything was OK because I’d gone to see him first, before anyone else.

“You guys are going to have a hard time with Alex when you have your periods,” she warned, although she smiled broadly when she said it. “Although he can relieve the pain almost right away, he’s never gotten used to bitchy women. He had plenty of exposure to moody women with Mom and my other sisters, but I never had a problem with it as a result of my exposure to him.”

“You know, that just isn’t normal,” Brooke informed her, having the day off just like Rebecca. “You had to suspect there was something else at work there?”

“No, I never suspected anything. As always, everything around Alex felt perfectly safe and secure. I just thought that everyone felt that way. When others would tell me about their own fears, worries or problems, I’d just think they didn’t have an older brother to lean on like I did. When my friend’s older brothers would tease me I’d just think they were strange for not being more like Alex. I just couldn’t imagine any man not being like my brother.”

“That must have made dating hard on you then,” Natalie said, trying to get her to reveal more personal details.

“Oh, it was,” Cate said, ignoring her wrapping as she got caught up in her story, relieved to finally confess everything to people who understood what her experiences were like. “It didn’t take long to realize that no one was close to Alex, but I just thought I was meeting all the wrong guys. I assumed there were a lot more toads than anyone was willing to admit, but that there must be plenty of other princes like Alex out there waiting for me, so I figured I’d just wait for them to show up one day. That’s why I never did much with anyone, and why I essentially just stopped dating altogether. I never once felt either safe or secure with any guy I ever met. They didn’t even have to get forward with me, they’d just look at me and I could feel their desire, and that I never amounted to more than a couple of breasts to them and that they’d tell me any lie they could think of just to play with something that didn’t reflect any part of my personality. I felt all that and I don’t even have anything for them to lust over,” she complained, hefting her tiny A-cup breasts in her hands.

“So how does feeling comfortable with him relate to your being dedicated to him?” Patricia asked. “You’ve explained why you don’t like dating but not about your motivations.”

“Well, he always watched out for me and paid me lots of attention, as I’m sure you’ve noticed from what I’ve said so far,” Cate answered. “The confidence he managed to give me let me think that I could accomplish anything I wanted to. So when I decided to become a scientist I just felt there was nothing holding me back. It was like that with everything. I owe everything I’ve ever achieved to Alex’s utter faith in me, and in the confidence that he’s continually filled me with.

“I don’t think Alex is aware of any of this,” Cate admitted, “and I know that Mom and Dad aren’t. About all he knows is that I like a simple hug every now and then. Just a hug is about all it takes. When I’d be terrified of sounds in the night as a little girl, I’d sneak past my sisters and my parent’s bedroom to get to Alex. He’d lay me beside him, hold me, whisper sweet nothings, and after a few moments I’d feel secure enough that I felt like I could tackle any monsters I might find. It was almost like a drug it was so strong and so effective.

“So basically I grew more dedicated to him out of simple greed, I always wanted my shot at him. If he was what made me OK in life, I wanted him there for me. If he made me confident enough to do the impossible, I wanted him close by to give me that confidence. It’s like a drug addict staying near her drug connection. Besides, he already felt close to me on his own, and I was so thankful for everything he gave me that I’d literally do anything I could for him. When some bully would pick on him, I’d have my friends talk to the sisters or friends of his to get them to back down. I tried to set him up on dates, since he was always so terminally shy, but it just never worked out. He’d get nervous, stammer and sweat, and they’d never get close enough for him to even touch them. I was always sure that all he’d need to do would be to hug his dates and they’d roll over for him like a puppy when you scratch their bellies.”

“It sounds like maybe you’re in the same category as Rebecca and I,” Natalie suggested. “You know, what Alex refers to as ‘the Watchers’.”

“Yeah, I’ve thought of that but I was afraid to suggest it. I’ve never managed to feel anything from anyone else. Well, aside from feeling leery about dates that is, but then I never had any actual evidence to back it up with. But normally I never felt anything about anyone other than Alex. I had a girlfriend who played me for a fool for years because I never suspected just how much she resented me, until people finally started admitting what she’d told them about me. I simply had no clue until that time. I assume that Alex generates so much of that type of energy that even someone with no tendencies could pick it up.”

“Yeah, that makes sense. That would make it more about Alex’s abilities than about any potential of your own,” Rebecca noted.

“You know,” Cate said, finally breaking the silence as she moved on to Natalie’s collection of little ceramic cats, “we’ve been focusing on why all of you are attracted to Alex, but we haven’t discussed what might be generating Alex’s abilities.”

“Wait, no way, honey, you’re not going to distract us by talking about our favorite subject, Alex,” Patricia said, wanting to hear more about Alex’s effects on his sister.

“Yeah, now that we’ve established why you’ve always been so attached to your brother, what about what’s been happening this week? How do you go from being close to your brother to making out with him?” Shani asked.

Cate stopped packing, sat back, closed her eyes and sighed heavily. “Look, I don’t think I’m ready to discuss that right now.”

“Wait a minute, you talk about being dedicated to your brother, you string him along, and now the two of you are barely speaking,” Shani said, leaning forward, hoping to get to the bottom of this latest issue. “This is clearly bugging Alex and he’s been beside himself with worry. Surely you don’t expect us to just drop it?”

“Look,” Cate said, opening her eyes and staring belligerently at Shani, “I made a mistake. OK? It happens. I’m still trying to figure out what happened and who’s to blame, so don’t expect me to wrap all my personal troubles in a nice little bow for you. Alex always complains about having no personal life anymore, well the same arguments go for me. This is a private aff... , it’s between Alex and I,” she corrected herself, realizing what she’d almost said, “and I’ll deal with it on my own!”

“Hey, OK, excuse me for worrying,” Shani said, leaning back from Cate’s verbal assault, holding her hands up in surrender. “Just don’t expect us to drop it completely. If it affects Alex, then it affects all of us as well.”

“Anh just said something I think the rest of us will agree with,” Patricia said, trying to get the conversation moving on again now that it was clear that Cate was digging her heels in and getting unresponsive again. This was the first time that Cate had really opened up to them, and Patricia didn’t want to lose this unique opportunity to learn more about how she and Alex worked together. “She asked whether you’re sure you aren’t one of the ‘Watchers’? I mean, you said you hadn’t felt anything from anyone else before, but maybe you’re not taking your proximity to Alex into account. We can all tell you, Alex pretty well overwhelms your ability to sense these things. I can imagine that living with him continually, you could easily discount whatever lesser impressions you’d get from anyone else.”

“That’s a good point,” Shani agreed. “You told us you could sense your boyfriend’s intentions. Although most guys tend to glare, that’s not usually something that most women can detect. I mean, what’s an honest interest in offered goodies versus a demeaning glance?”

“Plus, when you were with those boys, I’m pretty sure you weren’t with Alex,” Natalie pointed out, “so you’d have been more likely to notice someone’s else’s feelings while you wouldn’t when he was nearby, effectively washing out their weaker signals.”

Cate seemed to stop and consider this. “I’m not really sure. I never really thought of myself as being in the same class as the rest of you. I guess I might have been feeling things about people and just never took it seriously. But then again, how do you determine something like that? The only way we’ve been able to detect any of these Watchers is in their initial reactions to Alex. How do you test someone who’s been exposed to him since birth?” This always seemed to be Cate’s dilemma, not whether a problem exists, but how could she measure and categorize it?

“So, do you think Alex might be influencing everyone like that, not just those of us who can feel these emotions?” Patricia asked.

“I don’t think so,” Cate argued, “Otherwise Alex would have found a girlfriend long before he hit New Orleans. I think the only reason he’s been so successful here is that there are so many more people here. It really seems that only certain people are receptive to him. Even with the Watchers, there really aren’t that many of them. There’s more than there are like the rest of you, but neither one makes up a significant portion of the general population.”

“I guess you’re right,” Patricia conceded with a sigh. “He’s got everything going for him; he certainly doesn’t need to attract any more people to him than he already is. But we’ve still got the question about you, Cate. You say you can’t detect anything about people, and then you describe how you’ve always detected things about people. You’re going to have to consider that maybe you’re one of us.”

“I wish,” Cate said. “I’d love to see all these auras you all keep describing.”

“Yeah, you, me, Peter and Rebecca as well,” Natalie informed her. “We all watch the rest of you and think, ‘I came just this close genetically’,” she said, holding her fingers marginally far apart. They all laughed at her way of expressing her point.

“Besides, Cate is definitely one of us no matter what she may or may not be able detect or feel,” Shani added, grabbing Cate by the shoulder and giving her a reassuring squeeze. “If it wasn’t for her, none of us would have had the slightest idea what was happening to us.”

“Hey, guys,” said Frank, walking into the room suddenly. “You have anything else for us to do? We’ve finished up with everything out there.”

“Yeah, sure,” Rebecca told him with a wave at the boxes they’d been stacking. “You can start carrying some of these boxes out by the door so Natalie can either store or ship them.”

“What have you been gossiping about?” Linda asked, coming up behind her husband and wrapping her arms around him. “We’ve been listening to you talking away in here but we couldn’t hear any details.”

“What do you think we’ve been talking about?” Shani laughed. “We’re talking about how impressive your son is.”

“Well, I enjoy a little gossip about my son as well,” Linda replied with a gentle smile. “Just tone down the descriptions of his intimate sexual details or my husband might get jealous.”

“Hey, the kid’s got a bevy of beautiful women following him around and seems to find a new one around every corner,” Frank said, trying to defend himself from his wife’s playful banter. “Of course I’m jealous, what do you expect?”

“You know, to be honest, Alex hasn’t found anyone new for a little bit,” Shani pointed out. “His last one was Brooke. You really can’t count Rebecca and Peter, because we’ve known about the various Watchers for the past week, but we just haven’t done anything about it until recently. Maybe he’s already found everyone he’s likely to find here?”

“Possibly, but I’m ready to return home where there simply isn’t anyone for him to ‘activate’,” Frank announced as he comfortably held Linda’s hands that were holding his stomach. “It’ll be a nice reprieve from all the excitement this week.” They all agreed with him while they began shuttling their efforts out to the hallway in preparation for shipment.

However, while both Frank and Linda were busy moving boxes downstairs to the storage area, the girls got everyone else to hang back.

“Uh, excuse me,” Patricia added apologetically, “Anh has something to say to you, Cate. She didn’t want to say it while your parents were here, but there’s some things that the rest of us haven’t been willing to say. She says, while you talk about being dedicated to Alex, you certainly don’t show it.” Everyone turned to look at both Patricia and Anh.

“What do you mean?” Cate asked the normally quiet older woman, cocking her head to the side in confusion.

“She means that while you talk about being dedicated to Alex, you never show it. We watched you the other day. You broke into tears and flung yourself at him, and then after he hugged you for a few minutes, you simply turned and walked off.”

“You know she’s right,” Natalie said. “If you are really serious about wanting the best for him, you’d think you’d be a little more appreciative of him.”

“But I am,” Cate tried to argue, quickly glancing from one woman to another trying to gauge whether they all felt she’d actually been doing that.

“It sounds like you simply take from him,” Rebecca said, agreeing with the others.

“Whenever you’re feeling vulnerable you run to him, but as soon as you feel better you simply abandon him, leaving him with nothing but questions,” Shani said, joining in the new discussion.

“But I look out for him, I try to help him, I even set him—”

“Yes, but it could easily be argued that all that is just a way of controlling him. He’s kind enough to take care of you and you offer him nothing in return. After you get what you need you simply leave him cold without explaining anything. You say you set him up with your friends, effectively rewarding them for their friendship rather than helping Alex. If you were interested in Alex’s love life, you’d try to build his confidence with women. Instead you’ve likely made him think women are cold emotionless creatures that he can’t figure out.”

“I ... how ... but... , “ Cate sputtered, trying to figure out what to say.

“We’ve also noticed how the two of you tease each other, always poking fun at each other,” Patricia added. “It’s actually very destructive behavior, slowly belittling him. If I may be so bold as to ask, which of you started that? Was it Alex, or did you start and he just followed along in order to please you once again?”

“It’s true, it’s no wonder Alex is so shy,” Shani continued. “You have effectively trained him to never expect anything from the women close to him. Everything you’ve done for him has been for selfish reasons, you’ve been cold to him despite claiming that you owe everything to him, and you subtly undermine him every chance you get.”

“But, but I... , “ Cate started again before reconsidering. “Do I really? I haven’t really been aware of any of that. I’ve always thought I’ve been as nice as I could to him.”

Anh spoke out for a few moments, after which Shani translated. “Anh asks why you always walk away from him after a hug of only a few seconds. True, that might be all that you need, but don’t you think he may need a little more than just a momentary passing sign of affection?”

“I ... I guess I started years ago when he was young and didn’t like being hugged by a girl,” Cate suggested.

“That was years ago, and I’m sure you’ve both grown up a lot since then,” Patricia told her. “Besides, he cares enough to assist you whenever you need it, but aside from trying to control and limit him, what have you really done for him?”

“I... , “ Cate started again before pausing and looking lost, and then she started to cry. “I ... I can’t believe I’ve been being so mean to him. What have I been doing all of this time? He must hate me.”

The women watched her cry for some time, allowing her to process all of this information without interfering. Finally Shani stepped in.

“Alex doesn’t hate you. I’m not sure he has it in him, though I wouldn’t blame him if he did. By simply taking everything that Alex offers, you’ve effectively been hurting him all this time.”

“And all this ‘scientific advice’ you keep offering is actually more for your own interests rather than his,” Brooke pointed out. “Every time a new idea occurs to you your whole face lights up. You aren’t doing it for him, you’re only using him to advance your own career. You’ve said as much yourself every time you joke about using him to gain a Nobel Prize.”

Tears were now streaming down Cate’s cheeks as she kept turning from one accuser to the next, trying to learn all the things she’d been doing to her beloved brother all these years, even though it hurt her terribly every time they added another accusation.

“You know, I’m not sure that Cate’s been all that hard on him,” Patricia offered. As the one amongst them who had the most experience with non-accepting family, she knew how hard it was to be attacked by those you assume are supposed to be helping you. “After all, she’s always been there for him. Maybe she just needs some help in how she deals with him.”

“Maybe, but let’s return to Patricia’s point, about the one way you show him affection by teasing him,” Shani stated, taking out her frustration over anyone attacking Alex, even Cate. “That’s always bothered me, but I haven’t said anything about it because he seemed to accept it. Effectively, you belittle him by showing how superior you are. You say he makes you feel more confident, but it sounds to me like you’re gaining confidence by lowering his and thus making yourself feel better than he is.”

“But I—” Cate tried to argue again.

Once more Anh started speaking, and Shani again translated for her.

“Anh says that you keep trying to argue the points we’re making instead of listening to them. You keep trying to deny rather than address them. If you want to make a difference in Alex’s life, you have to change how you relate to him. It’s very simple really, either you show him how much you care for him, or you continue stabbing him in the back every chance you get.”

Cate really lost it then. She fell to the floor and started sobbing. Patricia started to reach out to her, but Anh held her back. The women weren’t finished with her yet. If this was an intervention, she wasn’t sure Cate had hit rock bottom yet.

“There’s one more thing, Cate,” Shani warned her. Cate looked up hesitantly, wiping at her damp eyes and cheeks, but at least she was attentive and listening now. “Although you’ve been getting your jollies all week watching the live sex shows your brother has been providing for you, you still haven’t done anything but take from him.”