Chapter 13

As I approached the building, soft strains floating far out into the night-air became audible, and I knew that the sweet spirit of music, to which they were all so devoted, was present with them. After listening for awhile in the shadow of the portico I went in, and, anxious to avoid disturbing the singers, stole away into a dusky corner, where I sat down by myself. Yoletta had, however, seen me enter, for presently she came to me.

“Why did you not come in to supper, Smith?” she said. “And why do you look so sad?”

“Do you need to ask, Yoletta? Ah, it would have made me so happy if I could have won your mother’s affection! If she only knew how much I wish for it, and how much I sympathize with her! But she will never like me, and all I wished to say to her must be left unsaid.”

“No, not so,” she said. “Come with me to her now: if you feel like that, she will be kind to you--how should it be otherwise?”

I greatly feared that she advised me to take an imprudent step; but she was my guide, my teacher and friend in the house, and I resolved to do as she wished. There were no lights in the long gallery when we entered it again, only the white moonbeams coming through the tall windows here and there lit up a column or a group of statues, which threw long, black shadows on floor and Wall, giving the chamber a weird appearance. Once more, when I reached the middle of the room, I paused, for there before me, ever bending forward, sat that wonderful woman of stone, the moonlight streaming full on her pale, wistful face and silvery hair.

“Tell me, Yoletta, who is this?” I whispered. “Is it a statue of some one who lived in this house?”

“Yes; you can read about her in the history of the house, and in this inscription on the stone. She was a mother, and her name was Isarte.”

“But why has she that strange, haunting expression on her face? Was she unhappy?”

“Oh, can you not see that she was unhappy! She endured many sorrows, and the crowning calamity of her life was the loss of seven loved sons. They were away in the mountains together, and did not return when expected: for many years she waited for tidings of them. It was conjectured that a great rock had fallen on and crushed them beneath it. Grief for her lost children made her hair white, and gave that expression to her face.”

“And when did this happen?”

“Over two thousand years ago.”

“Oh, then it is a very old family tradition. But the statue--when was that made and placed here?”

“She had it made and placed here herself. It was her wish that the grief she endured should be remembered in the house for all time, for no one had ever suffered like her; and the inscription, which she caused to be put on the stone, says that if there shall ever come to a mother in the house a sorrow exceeding hers, the statue shall be removed from its place and destroyed, and the fragments buried in the earth with all forgotten things, and the name of Isarte forgotten in the house.”

It oppressed my mind to think of so long a period of time during which that unutterably sad face had gazed down on so many generations of the living. “It is most strange!” I murmured. “But do you think it right, Yoletta, that the grief of one person should be perpetuated like that in the house; for who can look on this face without pain, even when it is remembered that the sorrow it expresses ended so many centuries ago?”

“But she was a mother, Smith, do you not understand? It would not be right for us to wish to have our griefs remembered for ever, to cause sorrow to those who succeed us; but a mother is different: her wishes are sacred, and what she wills is right.”

Her words surprised me not a little, for I had heard of infallible men, but never of women; moreover, the woman I was now going to see was also a “mother in the house,” a successor to this very Isarte. Fearing that I had touched on a dangerous topic, I said no more, and proceeding on our way, we soon reached the mother’s room, the large glass door of which now stood wide open. In the pale light of the moon--for there was no other in the room--we found Chastel on the couch where I had seen her before, but she was lying extended at full length now, and had only one attendant with her.

Yoletta approached her, and, stooping, touched her lips to the pale, still face. “Mother,” she said, “I have brought Smith again; he is anxious to say something to you, if you will hear him.”

“Yes, I will hear him,” she replied. “Let him sit near me; and now go back, for your voice is needed. And you may also leave me now,” she added, addressing the other lady.

The two then departed together, and I proceeded to seat myself on a cushion beside the couch.

“What is it you wish to say to me?” she asked. The words were not very encouraging, but her voice sounded gentler now, and I at once began. “Hush,” she said, before I had spoken two words. “Wait until this ends--I am listening to Yoletta’s voice.”

Through the long, dusky gallery and the open doors soft strains of music were floating to us, and now, mingling with the others, a clearer, bell-like voice was heard, which soared to greater heights; but soon this ceased to be distinguishable, and then she sighed and addressed me again. “Where have you been all the evening, for you were not at supper?”

“Did you know that?” I asked in surprise.

“Yes, I know everything that passes in the house. Reading and work of all kinds are a pain and weariness. The only thing left to me is to listen to what others do or say, and to know all their comings and goings. My life is nothing now but a shadow of other people’s lives.”

“Then,” I said, “I must tell you how I spent the time after seeing you to-day; for I was alone, and no other person can say what I did. I went away along the river until I came to the grove of great trees on the bank, and there I sat until the moon rose, with my heart full of unspeakable pain and bitterness.”

“What made you have those feelings?”

“When I heard of you, and saw you, my heart was drawn to you, and I wished above all things in the world to be allowed to love and serve you, and to have a share in your affection; but your looks and words expressed only contempt and dislike towards me. Would it not have been strange if I had not felt extremely unhappy?”

“Oh,” she replied, “now I can understand the reason of the surprise your words have often caused in the house! Your very feelings seem unlike ours. No other person would have experienced the feelings you speak of for such a cause. It is right to repent your faults, and to bear the burden of them quietly; but it is a sign of an undisciplined spirit to feel bitterness, and to wish to cast the blame of your suffering on another. You forget that I had reason to be deeply offended with you. You also forget my continual suffering, which sometimes makes me seem harsh and unkind against my will.”

“Your words seem only sweet and gracious now,” I returned. “They have lifted a great weight from my heart, and I wish I could repay you for them by taking some portion of your suffering on myself.”

“It is right that you should have that feeling, but idle to express it,” she answered gravely. “If such wishes could be fulfilled my sufferings would have long ceased, since any one of my children would gladly lay down his life to procure me ease.”

To this speech, which sounded like another rebuke, I made no reply.

“Oh, this is bitterness indeed--a bitterness you cannot know,” she resumed after a while. “For you and for others there is always the refuge of death from continued sufferings: the brief pang of dissolution, bravely met, is nothing in comparison with a lingering agony like mine, with its long days and longer nights, extending to years, and that great blackness of the end ever before the mind. This only a mother can know, since the horror of utter darkness, and vain clinging to life, even when it has ceased to have any hope or joy in it, is the penalty she must pay for her higher state.”

I could not understand all her words, and only murmured in reply: “You are young to speak of death.”

“Yes, young; that is why it is so bitter to think of. In old age the feelings are not so keen.” Then suddenly she put out her hands towards me, and, when I offered mine, caught my fingers with a nervous grasp and drew herself to a sitting position. “Ah, why must I be afflicted with a misery others have not known!” she exclaimed excitedly. “To be lifted above the others, when so young; to have one child only; then after so brief a period of happiness, to be smitten with barrenness, and this lingering malady ever gnawing like a canker at the roots of life! Who has suffered like me in the house? You only, Isarte, among the dead. I will go to you, for my grief is more than I can bear; and it may be that I shall find comfort even in speaking to the dead, and to a stone. Can you bear me in your arms?” she said, clasping me round the neck. “Take me up in your arms and carry me to Isarte.”