18: Diplomacy

I got up and opened the door, only to get jumped by a young bundle of effusive boy enthusiasm. I held him awkwardly while hugging Brooke and Rebecca hello, and then I motioned Suzy over to me. She was still reticent, but she came eagerly enough and I dropped to the floor to rough house with them both. Suzy was still hesitant, but once she figured out I wouldn’t break or get upset, she finally began to enjoy herself.

“Can we finally play some catch, Alex?” Josh eagerly asked me. “I’ve been waiting and practicing ever since you first promised me.”

“Of course we can,” I assured him as I stood up carrying Suzy, and went to my closet upstairs where I kept all my sports supplies. I grabbed a couple of gloves, Josh already had his own but Suzy didn’t.

“So, should we invite anyone else? We’ve almost got enough for a full team,” I suggested.

“Nah, I play girl ball with Suzy and my mom all the time. I want to play real baseball with the guys,” he answered.

“Humph,” Suzy mumbled, giving her opinion of this view.

“You don’t mind if Suzy plays, do you?”

“Well,” he said hesitantly, but he reconsidered when he saw his sister’s forlorn expression. “Sure, come on, Suze.” She immediately broke into a huge grin, happy to be included by her older brother. That single image brought back memories of Cate from long ago, touching a soft spot in my heart.

We all trooped out and started tossing the ball back and forth. Just like a typical big brother, Josh used Suzy’s enthusiasm to play with her brother to get her to retrieve all the misthrown balls for him. While she was off one more time, he turned to me.

“Suzy says that you’re the most powerful man in the whole world,” he stated as a simple fact.

“Josh, your sister can feel things that others can’t. I’m not someone anyone would notice, but both your sister and mom know things about me that the rest of the world doesn’t.”

“Yeah, Mom talks about you all the time. She says you are going to make a big difference in the world. So, will you?” he asked simply.

“To people like your Mom and sister, I’m important. To your friends at school, I’m nobody special.” I purposefully avoided any discussion of what I might achieve, since I had my own doubts about that. Besides, I wanted to get this main point across to him.

“So you’re like a secret agent or a superhero with a secret identity?” he asked, trying to wrap his little mind around the concept of subtlety by trying to associate it with popular fantasy.

“Something like that,” I replied, “except I have no super powers. What I have are a lot of people to find. So my secret mission is to find people like your mom, Rebecca and Suzy. Once I do, I teach them who they are so they can do amazing things on their own.”

“I’m not sure I understand,” he told me.

“That makes two of us,” I told him. “That makes two of us.”

Suzy came running up, only to notice we weren’t ready to play yet.

“Whatcha talking about?” she asked.

“We’re talking about what you told me. About Alex being super.”

“I didn’t say he was super,” she announced, sounding as exasperated as only a 9 year old could. “I said he was more powerful than anyone else, and that’s a fact. No one else is as powerful as he is,” she stated flatly, clearly indicating she would brook no disagreement with that clear fact.

“He’s not more powerful than Superman,” Josh stated. “Nobody is stronger than Superman!”

“That’s a big difference,” I explained, trying to get him to comprehend the difference between reality and fiction. “Superman is strong. His power is he can beat people up. I’m powerful because I have energy flowing through me, just like an electrical outlet. It’s power others can use so they can do amazing things themselves.” He looked at me with a confused expression so I figured I’d try a different tack.

“Strength and power aren’t the same. Being strong means you can make people do things. But people don’t like that. That’s why Superman has a fight with someone every episode. My power helps people like your mom gain their own powers. That’s how I help people.”

“So it’s like when you healed that guy?” Suzy asked, clearly fascinated by the topic.

“Yes, it is.”

“But isn’t that like a superpower?” Josh asked.

“Not really. It’s more like... ,” I paused to consider how to express my ideas to two youngsters, even though Suzy seemed to be following me better than her older brother was. “It’s like Martin Luther King. He wasn’t strong. He didn’t beat up the police who hurt people when they tried to make them obey bad laws. His ‘power’ was influencing people. He made people realize the police were wrong, and they changed the laws to make them fair.”

“We learned about Mr. King in school,” he told me.

“Good, then hopefully you’ll understand how important what he did was. But he didn’t use strength or super powers to change the world. You have to understand, Josh, that what makes a man isn’t that he’s stronger than anyone else. What makes a boy into a man is when he learns to accept responsibility. When he figures that people depend on him and he needs to take care of them, and that he wants to help them more than he wants things for himself.”

That seemed to get his attention, and he stopped to ponder it.

“So if I help mom with the groceries, I’ll be a man?” he asked.

“Well, you’ll be learning to be a man. But it takes something bigger than doing what you are told. It’s when you decide to do something for other people because it’s the right thing to do, not because you were told to do it.

“I did things for myself for a long time, but then I found I had this odd ability. I could have continued to be that older kid by only doing what I wanted to do. But instead I decided to take care of people that were looking for my help. That’s why everyone considers me important, because I make a difference in their lives. Superman might be strong, but while he protects people he doesn’t help them grow. Instead I helped them learn who they are.”

“Don’t they know who they are?” Josh asked.

“Well, it’s more complex than that.” I stopped and thought about what I was saying once again. “Martin Luther King was important because he helped people be free. He showed his people they could be free, even if the whites told them they couldn’t. I’m doing the same thing. I’m telling people like your sister they have talents they didn’t know about. They can use them to become better people. I show them they don’t have to be what others tell them they have to be. They can be something more.

“If your mom told anyone she could see a person’s soul, everyone would tell her that it’s impossible. But she knows better. I used my power to help her accomplish that, then I told her how to use it. I took responsibility for helping her, and she took responsibility in helping you. That’s what makes people into adults.”

“So you’re like Moses then? Like when he led his people out of Africa?” Suzy offered.

“Actually he led them out of Egypt, but I guess you could say that. I’m trying to organize my people. I’m trying to identify them, to tell them what they can be and to help them learn how to live.”

“Are you going to wander in the desert for 40 years then?” Josh asked.

“I don’t plan on it,” I said, smiling at him. “I’m not freeing them from slavery. Instead I’m freeing them from ignorance. Do you know what ‘ignorance’ is?” They both nodded their heads. “Well, they all think they’re just normal people, but I know better, and people like your mother can see that they aren’t. So it’s my job to try to tell them they are really a special type of people.”

“Did you really heal that guy?” Josh asked, apparently finished with the current discussion. I didn’t know if he understood it or simply lost interest in it, but I humored him nonetheless.

“Yeah, although I don’t really like anyone to know about it. I’ve also helped out at the local hospital here.”

“Did you heal anyone there?” Suzy asked, eager to hear about how I could use the power she could feel in me.

“Well, I helped several people, and helped a few get better. But with great power comes great disappointment as well. I couldn’t save everyone. Some of them are still sick, and that makes me sad,” I explained, trying to tell them what I was going through. I didn’t know why I felt compelled to tell them that, but I thought they’d do better knowing about my experiences.

“What’s it like?” Suzy asked out of the blue.

“What’s what like, Suzy?”

“What’s it like being so powerful?”

“I can’t really answer that easily, Suzy. I didn’t even know I had any power until recently. Even though I have all this energy in me, I can’t feel it like you can, so I never knew about it. But what I can feel is how good it is to help people. When I saved that guy in New Orleans, it felt good, even if it didn’t feel good to have people talking about it. That’s another thing about being an adult. You do things because you should, not because you get something out of it. I don’t want attention because I do what I should. I do it because it helps the people that need it.”

“That’s quite a little lesson you’re teaching,” my father’s voice unexpectedly informed me. He’d apparently walked up to us unnoticed, while I was talking. “Of course, I’m not sure whether they’re ready to learn it quite yet, but hopefully the ideas will germinate for a while. Then maybe it will make a difference as they grow older.” With that he took the ball from my glove and tossed it to Suzy, who eagerly ran after it. My little lesson was like a leaf, blowing away on the wind. By itself, it didn’t make much of a difference. But, if enough of them fell to the ground, it would change the landscape of the yard. I hoped the same was true for the landscape of their young minds.

I figured I still had a LOT to learn about dealing with kids...

I had fun with the kids and they had a blast, but all that talk about helping others somehow brought up memories of the girl I had lost. I know it was silly, and that there wasn’t anything that I could have done about it, but it still continued to haunt me. Talking about my responsibility to others reminded me that I’d failed in my responsibility to her, whether it was my fault or not, and that still hurt. While the kids were playing in the house—Dad was entertaining Josh while my girls were all trying to tell Suzy about her new life—I decided to get out on my own and think about things for a bit.

When I casually mentioned that I was heading out as I grabbed my keys, I was quickly confronted by a concerned group of women who halted what they were doing to confront me.

“Where think you going?” Anh pointedly asked, practicing her improved skills by speaking in clear English for a change.

“I’m just going for a drive. I’m not going to visit anyone, but I just wanted to get out and think for a bit.”

“Good, I’ll go with you then,” Gail announced as if it was the end of the discussion. “I’m the best equipped if anything happens.”

“What could happen? I’ll probably just go to the Sonic,” I protested.

“Good, I can always use a diet soda,” she countered. “Alex, you seem to have a way of getting yourself into trouble, besides the fact you’re still suffering from a concussion and shouldn’t really be driving. We all depend on you, and we’d be lost without you. Our entire future, no, the entire future of our species depends upon you. While we all share some unique abilities, only you can activate them, and only you can handle the telepathy. We can’t just let you get into trouble anymore,” she insisted.

“Look, you can’t live my life for me. I’ve got to deal with things as they come up. Things have just been a bit strained lately, I’m sure they’ll calm down. Just let me handle it on my own, OK?” They didn’t look convinced.

“Maybe,” she hesitated, “but it’s no deal until you’re finished healing. While I’m here, I’m officially in charge. I’m your official protection detail. If you want to flirt with a pretty girl at the mall, that’s fine, I’ll just blend into the background. But you’re going to have to get used to having us look out for you, because it’s not just you anymore. It’s all of us, and all of our descendants as well.” Geez, what a depressing thought. I can’t even go for a drive without armed guards for fear of how it might affect my unborn great grandchildren that I may never have. However, I shut up and let her accompany me to the car.

“You know,” I began, after we’d driven a little ways, “you’re really the one who needs to be back there learning all of this stuff.”

“I’ve got the rest of my life to learn it, I’ve got time,” she assured me.

“Yeah, but you’ve got a job, and only so many days you can spend with us,” I reminded her.

“We’ll have to talk about that eventually. I like the job, but it’s stressful, and this new life feels much more critical to me now. As a cop I can’t do much more than react to trouble after it happens. Here I can build a future for all of our kind.”

“Our kind? You’re talking like we aren’t even human anymore.”

“Who knows, maybe we’re not. But we aren’t going to be anything unless you can keep your head down. You very well could have been killed the other day. And it wasn’t the first time. You seem to attract attention, both good and bad.” I simply sat back and sulked like a sullen teen for a while. She simply smiled at me and I knew I was acting stupidly, but I couldn’t help it. Hell, these damn teen hormones still controlled much of my life, and I was feeling particularly overwhelmed by my new life, once again.

We did in fact stop at the local fast food hangout. I saw a couple of kids from school but nobody I really knew. However I was generating looks from other people besides them. I recognized a couple of them as either previous graduates or family of kids at school. I was wondering just how far my reputation was growing, now that I could hardly go out of the house without attracting attention.

Gail did as she suggested and simply stood at the counter with a soft drink in her hand while I sat at a table by myself. My life had certainly gone through some rapid changes. I’d gone from a shy loner with a couple of friends to a telepathic freak with no friends but plenty of potential lovers. I wondered where this wild ride of mine would end and whether I’d like it or myself when it did.

Finally I gave up and signaled Gail that I was done pouting. I figured maybe I’d just try going for a walk the next time I felt morose, it would be less embarrassing having to find my local guard, and I wouldn’t have to deal with stares. Gail still kept her distance. Maybe she was also thinking about my growing reputation, but we both got into the car together.

“Heady thoughts, huh?” she prompted.

“Yeah, it’s hard to get used to being a freak and a savior in such a short time.”

“You’re hardly a freak, and even if you are, you’re surrounded by like minded freaks to help support you. It might help if you could find some friends who are independent of all of this mess, though. It’s too bad your friends all abandoned you once you found some success. I’m sure there’s no shortage of girls that would be glad to talk with you, but I’m not sure that’s quite what you’re looking for right now.”

“Yeah, I was kind of just looking to being an average guy for a bit and just talk about football or the weather, not what effect I’m going to have on unborn generations.”

“Well, I’d say, given all the craziness that’s been happening, that you’ve been adapting quite well. Try to be on the lookout for anyone who might be sympathetic. If you were a bit older I’d just drop you at a nearby bar to get shitfaced, you just seem to be in that frame of mind.”

“Yeah,” I scoffed, “I can just hear about the damage I’d be doing to my future generations of grandkids from the alcohol.” She laughed briefly and we fell into an uncomfortable silence for the rest of the drive.

Gail left a little while after we got back. I continued to act pouty, hiding in my room studying. The girls all respected my mood and left me mostly alone, which I appreciated. There was still quite a bit to adjust to. I hadn’t quite figured everything out yet.

I figured school was going to be interesting that Monday morning. If I’d been getting strange looks before, then I could imagine the ones I’d be getting now. Between the news of my injury and possibly news of what I’d done at the hospital, all dumped on top of my previous reputation, it didn’t look very promising.

As much fun as I’d had the day before, I was in a better mood after a decent night’s sleep, and my head didn’t feel as badly as it had. Once we got to school I immediately went in search of Darrel to offer a little peace offering over the trouble with his brother. I figured I owed him that.

Instead of the response I’d been expecting, the one I received was equally as mystifying. Everyone continued to watch, but no one did anything they hadn’t before. Could it be possible that no one had heard about the fight between Brandon and me? I also noticed a few of the black kids watching me a bit warily, but I figured that was to be expected. At least they weren’t openly hostile. Not yet, at any rate. I figured I’d deal with them directly later on.

As I came up to Darrell, I noticed the people around him who noticed me seemed to back away, which I thought was silly; didn’t they realize the trouble between us was over now that he and I were dating ... No, scratch that, maybe they didn’t realize it was all over. When I stopped beside him as he was unlocking his locker and said hello, he actually jumped. Fairly strange for a large linebacker used to getting hit, but I just ignored it.

“Hey, Darrel, I just wanted to talk to you about the trouble with your brother.”

“Oh,” he responded, seemingly relieved, “I’m sorry about that. He asked me about where Chalise was and I gave him a brief recap of what’d happened between us, and he kind of went nuts.”

“Yeah, I’ll say. He was acting like a berserker. That’s another thing, I think you may want to talk to your parents about him possibly being given too many steroids by that college team he’s on. I don’t want to cause any trouble, but if he flies off the handle so easily he’s likely to end up in some real trouble.”

He looked at me oddly, then mumbled, “Man, after all the grief my father and Brandon have caused you, and you’re worried about him.” But then he got serious again, “I don’t think you have to worry about that ... it seems the damage to his knee is fairly extensive, and he’s going to be out of it for quite awhile, making you official persona non grata around our house. Speaking of which, do you know where my mother and sister are staying? My Dad tried to reach them, but hasn’t had any luck.”

“Are you sure you want to know? I’ll tell you if you can keep from letting your Dad know, but either way, I’ll tell them to give him a call so they can all talk it out. Hopefully everyone has had a few days to calm down.”

“You may be right, I’m probably better off not knowing. And I don’t think there’s going to be any calming down. My father and brothers all actively hate you right now. I’d watch my back if I were you. Dad actually asked me to kick your ass for him. And I don’t mean a light kick like I’d been thinking of originally.”

“Well, thanks for the warning. Just so you know, like I told your sister, I don’t hold any of your family responsible for what happened. I think your brother was a bit unsettled and reacted unnecessarily. I really like your mother and sister, and generally feel like we could get along if you wouldn’t object. I’d like to get to know the rest of the family as there’s probably a lot of similarity between us, but I’m guessing now’s not a very good time for that.”

“No,” he laughed sourly, “it’s not a very good time. As for the rest, I hope you’ll continue to feel that way in the future,” he added mysteriously.

“Don’t worry,” I told him, “despite our earlier disagreement, I’ve always had a good feeling about you. Despite the tough guy image you try to project, I think deep inside you are basically a decent guy trying to bluff his way out. That’s why I told Kitty you were a good guy, because I figured you could be if you let it out.”

“Yeah, well, we’ll have to see just how good I can be. Look, I gotta go. Sorry about what Brandon did to you. Despite whatever may happen, I really wish you the best for what you’ve done for me.”

“Hey,” I called out to his retreating form, “I didn’t do anything. It was all Kitty’s doing.” Figuring the conversation was ended when he left I headed off to class, noticing the surrounding students all looking disappointed that we didn’t come to blows. I didn’t understand how they could still expect that kind of behavior between us, but I guess Darrell’s reputation spoke for a lot.

As I continued with my day the looks didn’t end. It seems I was suddenly the center of attention again, and I was wondering just what was causing it; the fight with Brandon, the incident at the Hospital, or maybe something the girls had mistakenly said. Again, it seemed to be split by the sexes. The girls were all keenly interested, while the guys all seemed to be expecting trouble from or towards me. I guessed I’d find out what was causing it eventually. I just couldn’t do anything about it until then.

Part way through my second class some guy started to ask me if I knew about Darrell and Kitty. Before he could continue I cut him off.

“Look, it’s OK. I know she’s dating him and I have no problem with it. But I don’t need to hear any details. What the two of them do is strictly their business, just like what I do with anyone is our business. I don’t believe in private moments between two individuals being shared with the whole school.”

“Yeah but—”

“I know you mean well, but I think we can all handle it between ourselves. OK?” He reluctantly agreed and that was that. I don’t know why there’s such a market for random gossip about topics people have no knowledge of. In Physics class, Alice managed to substitute lab partners with me again, despite the fact that all the participants were there today.

“Alex,” she whispered excitedly, “is what I heard about true?”

I groaned. “What, exactly, do you think you heard?”

“A policewoman came to you in the Hospital, went down on her knees, and pledged her allegiance to you.” She was practically salivating at the concept.

“I wouldn’t believe everything you hear,” I cautioned, trying to head off any similar rumors. “First of all, why would a random police officer do something like that? Secondly, you really can’t listen to random rumors—”

“Jonathon Pride’s sister saw it at the Hospital. Apparently she works on the floor you were on and saw the entire thing.” I groaned again, no wonder everyone was staring at me lately.

“Look, it wasn’t what it looked like, she did no such thing, and she was just kidding around. Seriously, can you think of any reason why an adult police officer would do any such thing?”

“Well, I can think of one or two things,” she teased. I just sighed again. Fighting this rumor was going to be an uphill battle.

“Just let it rest, Alice.”

“OK. What about you and Bulldozer’s brother?”

“You mean Darrell’s brother Brandon? Yes, we had a mild altercation, but it wasn’t anything serious. It was just a mistake on his part.”

“I heard he put you in the Intensive Care Ward with a broken head over the position you put Bulldozer in, and for messing around with his sister.”

“That was the gist of it, but we didn’t really have a chance to talk. It was all over before we managed to say much of anything. Personally I think he was just letting off steam over something else.”

“Ok, then, what about—?”

“Look, Alice, I appreciate the concern, but you’ve got to stop focusing so much on a few silly rumors. It always sounds much more exciting than it really is. There really are reasonable explanations for all the stories you hear, and nothing is as sexy as you think it is. Now, can we just focus on the lab and forget about all this nonsense?” She looked disappointed at ending the conversation, but also because I looked so disappointed in her. Thinking that I may have hurt her feelings, I grabbed her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, making her eyes light up. Damn, how was I affecting all these girls like this, I asked myself?

I was planning on sitting at the black table again, in order to head off any problems with anything they may have heard about me. But when I entered the lunchroom, I hadn’t gone a dozen steps when I found myself attacked by a crying female. Stepping back, I saw Kitty was terribly upset as she tearfully asked me to take her somewhere private because she was horribly embarrassed. I gritted my teeth, angry that some rumor about me had impacted this lovely young girl. I kept her close to me as I steered us out, just daring anyone to say or try anything with us. We moved outside and found a quiet tree to sit besides.

“It’s Darrell,” she cried. “He’s been telling everybody that he had sex with me. I’m the laughing stock of the school. He said—” I cut her off before she could continue.

“Look, I’ll say again that I don’t care what you and he may or may not have done. What I am upset in is Darrell’s actions. I’m really disappointed in him. I thought he might be a decent guy and that’s why I told you to go out with him. I’m sorry he didn’t live up to my expectations, and it’s all my fault for putting you into that position.”

“No, no, you don’t understand. I—”

“Again,” I warned her with a finger to her lips, “You’re not responsible for this, regardless of what you may or may not have done. The entire fault is Darrell’s for bragging to his friends. I don’t know what he could have been thinking? Did he think this was going to turn out well? Everyone knew he was dating you. I’d also made it clear what you and he did together was nobody’s business. It isn’t like he needed to brag about another notch—” that was apparently the wrong word to use as Kitty burst into tears again, so I just shut up and hugged her.

“I don’t know, either,” she finally sobbed once she’d managed to get some control over her tears. “I was really nice to him. I gave him a fair chance like you asked, I went out of my way and we had fun together. I don’t understand why he’s being such an ass.” Again I just held her without contributing anything more. I finally started to realize that the typical guy’s response of trying to figure out a problem they can fix wasn’t what was needed here. I simply needed to be here for her and let her vent. There wasn’t anything either of us could do about it now; the damage to her reputation had already been done. No wonder he was speaking in code, I thought. He didn’t want to admit what he’d already done when I talked to him. He’d jerked back when I said hello, thinking I’d already heard and was after revenge for Kitty’s honor, not that I’d achieve much being beaten up again for the second time in three days.

After she’d vented for a while, we started to talk about what our choices were. We decided, or rather I kind of let her decide, that there wasn’t much we could do. I could pick a fight with him, but that wouldn’t change anything. We couldn’t retract his statements for him, and apparently our best efforts to get him to stand up for himself had fallen flat. Once again the end result was that the damage had already been done and we were powerless to change it. All we could do was put our best foot forward, hold our heads up high, and just let the world know we didn’t care what they thought about some silly rumor about us. Well, at least that was my opinion. I tried to convince her of it, but she seemed highly doubtful. Needless to say I didn’t bring up my own rumor problems. They just weren’t her concern, she had her own problems.

“I don’t know how I’m going to face Chalise,” she added.

“That’s nonsense,” I insisted. “You and Chalise are close friends now. She has no control over her relatives, and she’s never gotten along, nor agreed with, their behaviors. Don’t hold her responsible for Darrell’s stupidity. You know she’s going to be sympathetic. You two are as thick as thieves. I have a feeling that if I disappeared you both would be friends for a long, long time.”

“I guess you’re right,” she conceded. “She’s had a long history of trouble with her brothers, and she’s certainly not their favorite sibling right now, as it is. If I were you I’d keep my distance from him, though,” she cautioned me, not realizing I’d already spoken with him today. “Since your deal is off, he’s under no obligation to be nice to you anymore.”

“Don’t worry about me,” I told her, “I can take care of myself.” She laughed.

“So far, I’d have to agree with Cate, it really doesn’t look like it.” We both laughed at that, which helped both of our spirits.

After lunch I was steaming. I wasn’t really terribly angry at Darrell, he was free to think or say whatever he wanted. I was just disappointed that he’d be so casual about a relationship he professed to care so much about. Was all that talk just bluster? Why would he pick a fight with me if he didn’t give a shit about Kitty? Nothing today was making much sense, other than the fact that I had a shitload of trouble to deal with, that is.