Fallibly Human
by Jon Fenton
Copyright© 2021 by Jon Fenton
Science Fiction Story: Orson Walters is an Andriod (who prefers the term "mechanical human) is going for his first job and needs to stand out among the other robot applicants. Will his creator Joe's advice help him?
Orson Walters strolled through the manager’s office for his first job interview. His stomach circuits churned out of anxiety. Though creator Joe was connected into his ear wirelessly and would be right here to help him along; he still hated doing these interviews, and this was his eighth one this month. He shook hands and greeted the hiring manager; making sure there was eye contact between the two of them. Doing so intimated Orson further as this lady towered over him and was pretty. He, like his creator Joe, was short and stocky.
“Nice to meet you, Orson, I’m Stacy Steimbrook. I’ve been a recruiter at Caretech industries for over ten years. Today we are conducting interviews for various positions here and it looks like you applied for our Human Resources Generalist job. Can you tell me why we should give you this job over all these other robots?”
Orson cleared his throat and pushed up his thick, black-framed glasses. “I prefer the term Mechanical Human but very well.”
In his ear, Joe chimed in. Relax! Tell her to pull your finger.
Orson held out his finger. “Here, pull it.”
Stacy looked surprised. “Excuse me.”
“Go ahead and pull it,” Orson said. Stacy pulled his finger and he farted, filling the room with an acrid smell.
They both chuckled a bit, but Stacy stopped suddenly and shook her head. “I will warn you that it is inappropriate for an interview.”
“Can I ask you a question, Stacy?” Orson said. Have you ever seen a mechanical human laugh? Do any robots that work here have a sense of humor like myself?
“Nope,” Stacy said.
Orson rested his feet on Stacy’s desk. “Well, here you go.”
Stacy looked at Orson’s resume once more. “Ok next question Orson. Time to get serious again, ok?” She pushed his feet off of her desk and continued. “So why do you want to work here Orson?”
“Don’t worry it was just an ice breaker,” Orson said. “My apologies.”
“Or a windbreaker,” Stacy said. They both laughed. “Ok Orson, back to business.”
Joe came on the line and told him what to say next. Compliment the way she and other ladies here look.
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