Chapter 3: Mending Old Wounds

“Then tell me what happened next?” the psychologist asked Neo. The look of concern on the man’s face was apparent.

“You tell me...” Neo tried to say with a mild discouraging remark.

It had been well over three hours since the race. Neo sat down on the couch near his psychologist. He felt the familiarity of being in the room. It was one that he had been in many times before ... almost countless times.

The office itself was one that wasn’t too big of a place. Oshun was never the sort of place that had much living space. There were a few posters and pieces of painted art that decorated the enclosed soundproof walls. There was a singular art-crafted metal desk, a couple of chairs, and a long comfy couch for one to sleep on. The room only consisted of a single enclosed sliding door that remained closed for this emergency discussion.

The psychologist was a person that Neo had already met many times before. Doctor Frenry was a man of mixed complexion. He was bald and wore nicely trimmed trousers and a blue-collar shirt. He had a tablet in his hand that he would look off and on at while occasionally typing something down on the screen. The only genuinely unique feature about him was the light blue-colored eyes that he had. The augmented eyes allowed him to see things that normal eyes couldn’t, but Neo could never figure out why he didn’t just get typical colored augmented eyes that were less noticeable.

Frenry shook his head. “That isn’t going to work,” the doctor told him. “Avoiding in answering the question isn’t going to get you out of here anytime sooner.”

“Don’t you already have the information?” Neo asked with hesitation. “It’s all there on your tablet.”

“I read a little bit, but I prefer that you tell me out of your own words.”

Frenry seemed more than cooperative. He was reasonable as any person would go. His tone was always straightforward in how he communicated, and Neo had little room to argue with him.

“Fine...” Neo relented. “I was ... racing in the final qualifying race from the Oshun-400. I was on the second lap when I ... my leg stopped working.”

“According to the report, you had a severe panic attack. We hadn’t had that in over a month since now.”

“I know...” Neo remarked as he sighed. He put his hands to his head as he sighed. “It was because of the stupid leg.”

“Were you able to find out the problem?”

“It was one of the synthetic nerve clusters near the knee. The hospital took it and made the fixes to it before I got it back. I hadn’t had any further problems since then.”

“Is this a common issue with your leg, having malfunctions with it?”

“Why is that so important?”

“Because you verbally assaulted a pedestrian over it,” the doctor continued.

Neo grimaced a little bit. “It ... I don’t know. It happened so fast that I barely had time to deal with it. I just remember everything falling apart after that first lap.”

“You went through several races before,” Fenrey commented as he tapped a couple of buttons on his tablet. “The last time you came here, you had panic attacks after the race was complete, but not to this extent.”

“I know.”

“Have you been taking your medications as prescribed?”

“Yes,” Neo commented as he gave a simple nod in response.

“I see. Tell me how your sleeping has been. Notice any differences?”

“I still have a hard time sleeping at nights at times. I take the ones that are designed to knock me out ... the Descrenicol ... it does too much of a good job at times.”

“It’s a heavy dosage that you’re taking,” Fenrey said as he briefly sighed. “The fact is that we are trying to find ways to help you.”

“What about the Literencipred? Could that be increased to stop these ... panic attacks?”

The doctor shook his head. “That isn’t what I’m trying to get at. Neo, I have had a chance to evaluate much of your behavior, and I can conclude that what you have isn’t any form of chemical imbalance. You have been fighting Post Traumatic Stress Disorder much like many veterans in the last year, especially those that fought against the Itreans. It isn’t easy. Our goal is to try to find a long-term solution to help you. I had no problems in trying to get you more and more off the meds, but even in a relapse such as this, I feel that increasing meds will make things worse in the long run.”

Neo got out of his chair as he showed signs of being flustered. “How am I supposed to operate in society now!?” his voice raised. “I practically pulled over and wept like a baby for no damn reason.”

“You didn’t sit down and weep like a baby. You were showing signs of being traumatized. The loss of your leg was one of the most dire moments that occurred to you in the course of five months. I know the full medical report. You almost died from the injury alone, and you saw it visually in front of your eyes.”

“Of course...” Neo commented. “Wouldn’t take long for somebody to upload my breakdown on every UWAN site out there. How am I supposed to view the world out there like this?”

“Like what you’re doing now. We’re here until we can try to find solutions to help you. Again ... I can’t let you fault yourself over these events. You have been improving over time. Don’t let this singular event define yourself. It’s perfectly normal for you to behave in this sort of fashion.”

Neo seemed unconvinced as he went and had a seat. “Yeah ... but now, I just lost the race because of it. I’m sure to get a DnF for this. I needed to at least get 5^th place to go to the Oshun-500 and UWALVR races.”

Frenry nodded his head. “Maybe you felt that you were genuinely not ready to engage it.”

Neo shook his head in disagreement. “No ... I was more than ready for it. It’s ... been my dream to be faster than anybody in those streets. It isn’t about ... glory ... I just want to be fast. I want to be a part of Oshun’s history of street racers. Now ... it’s over. They won’t give me a second chance ... I’m sure of it.”

The doctor seemed skeptical. “Are you absolutely sure of that?”

“Yes.”

“I think that you should leave a message for the audience to go by ... at least that is what I recommend for you. Be honest with your supporters. Let them know what has happened.”

“Even if I lost the race?”

“Even if you lost the race,” Fenrey confirmed. “I think that we need to look at further alternative solutions. For example, why do you want to be remembered by Oshun?”

“Because I was born here. I ... was part of the culture of street racers ... I even remember the times I got my first motorcycle working.” Neo smiled as he thought about it. “I don’t care too much about fame, but I still want to leave a legacy.”

“Leave a legacy? There are many ways that it can be done. Can it be only achieved by racing?”

Neo seemed to think about it. “It is the only way that I know of.”

“You’ve put all your hopes into one thing. I remember in the past appointments that you told me that ever since you were discharged because of your PTSD and leg injury that you wanted to get into the realm of racing. At the time, it was the way for you to heal.”

“Why do I have a feeling you are about to tell me otherwise?”

The phycologist shook his head. “I’m still behind you if that is your desire. It was what you truly wanted, however. Today you had a breakdown because something else was bothering you. It drove you to pull over. You need something else to help you along the way.”

Neo felt more inclined to disagree. “I don’t see how I could feel that way. I just gave up my racing career because of this stupid event.”

“Deep down, you want something different to happen, Neo. Racing is a part of you, but you need more than that. Your mind has made its decision. It knew that pulling over was your conscious telling you that more needed to be done. If you walked out of the race as a grand champion, you would still be in this office right now having the same problem as before.”

“You really think so?”

Fenrey nodded. “Very much so.” The doctor put his tablet down. “Tell me about your friendships. Do you have any friends?”

“Not many ... not since the battle.”

“And your family? How are they?”

“I get along with my parents pretty well. I speak with them often.”

“What about boyfriends or girlfriends?”

Neo seemed to think about it as he shook his head. “No girlfriends ... boyfriends.”

The doctor noticed that Neo gave a slight grimace as he thought about it. “I noticed that you disliked answering that question. Are you trying to find a romantic interest or avoid it?”

“Neither ... just not sure about it.”

“I can see the hesitation. I think that you have been repressing your desire to find another.”

“I don’t know.”

“No, you do know. You told me before that you wanted to look into the idea of starting a family.”

“That and racing don’t mix.”

Frenry shook his head. “Many racers are married or have relationships. Some have children. There is no shame in that. I’m sure there are plenty that has expressed interest in having a romantic interest with you.”

“I just ... hadn’t looked into.”

“That is for certain. I think that you need to get out and meet people. I’m not asking you to go and find some individual to have a romantic night with but for you to go and meet friends. Socialize with others. Eventually, you’ll find a woman or a man that might be interested in having children with you.”

Children ... the idea was something that he knew the doctor was going to discuss. The topic had been something that he remembered discussing before. He even remembered expressing interest in settling down, but only briefly. It just felt like a natural hurdle to even pursue the idea. But then again, him pulling over just now was a call for help in some way or another. He had to make sense of himself.

“Perhaps you are right,” Neo relented. “I just ... feel like I will meet some woman that will tell me that she is interested in starting a family together, and she will tell me to quit racing. I don’t want that. I want somebody that will accept me for who I am. I want to ... train and teach my child in how to race if they are interested.”

“Then I recommend for you to start looking into the idea of dating again. Don’t look at the events that occurred today as a loss but as a message from your soul. You want more than just racing. Companionship is what you need now.”

Neo was still hesitant. “I don’t know. I practically snapped at that Shal’rein woman today. Blamed her for taking my leg and all.”

“You know that she is only a member of the T’rintar clan. The Shal’rein...”

“I know what she is,” Neo interrupted him as he raised his hands up. “The Shal’rein of the T’rintar clan are not the enemy. It is the Shal’rein clan that were the ones that launched the attack on this planet.”

“If that is the case, how do you feel about them? The Shal’rein of the T’rintar?”

“It just ... I see their faces and feel like I want to punch them. I don’t care if they are taller than me. When I found out about the Itreans and the subspecies, I wanted to find out about the ones that attacked Oshun. It was them ... the shark women. I ... despise them. Even the Itreans, in general, just got a good deal with this whole alliance. They might have given us Eutera back, but it doesn’t save the fact that they originally kidnapped those colonists just to run their little sex experiments. Then the other clans just attacked this planet and didn’t give a damn about us. Nobody did ... nobody.”

“You felt a general prejudice towards our new allies.”

This statement caused Neo to become defensive. “I’m no racist ... alien racist or whatever you want to call it.”

“Don’t feel like this is an attack on your character, Neo. Far from it. I believe that the best course of action for you is to look into something that you might not have considered. I think that it might be the best course of action that will help you along the way.”

“What is it?” he reluctantly asked.

“Look into associating with the Itreans. The best way for you to heal is to meet them face to face. There are numerous ways this can be done. You aren’t the only veteran or person that has been impacted by the Itreans. We all have. In some way or another. I work with families that have lost loved ones even in the siege on this planet.”

“And ... I guess I should ask how?”

“For one UWAN dating sites.”

Neo almost choked the moment that he heard that. “Um ... what?”

“Of course, the choice is always yours, but I can tell you have some things here and there. I have a brother that started dating through there. He ended up meeting a Yutilian woman. He was a little reluctant with the whole idea of falling in love with an alien, but it worked out. They already got married and have been together ever since.”

“We only got started with their alliance over a few months ago. They already got married?”

“Yes. Of course, the Itreans operate a little bit differently when it comes to that process. The point is that my brother is very happy. I think that you should look into something like this as well.”

Neo put his hand to his head as he remained skeptical. He knew very well that the Itreans had their deadly Zilik’s Disease that wiped out the male population of all the species. The reason why the alliance with the T’rintar clan was because humanity offered male bachelors and Earth, the origin of all life for both Itreans and the humans, to them. Of course, there was more to it than just that.

“I’m not sure about it,” Neo commented. “The idea of dating an Itrean is just ... they aren’t like us.”

“What is it that you genuinely want, Neo? You have told me that you wanted to have a family. These Itreans could offer that to you.”

“Yeah, but they wouldn’t carry the same interests as I would.”

“Are you sure about that? There are hundreds of billions of Itrean women that are interested in being with a human male. You can’t tell me that not one of them would be interested in racing and your career?”

The doctor had made a point. Even Neo could tell that he was personally coming up with excuses. The Itrean women, in general, must have been similar enough that humans were already getting some of them pregnant. Supposedly, humanity carried an essential gene in their blood that was immune to Zilik’s Disease. Male children could be born again because of it. The T’rintar clan were no one’s fools. In an ongoing war with the other clans, having male children again would work out in the long run. The catch, of course, was society. The alliance between both races was vital but questionable. Were the T’rintar clan only using humanity to fulfill those goals? A part of him really considered the prospect while he scratched the back of his head.

“That’s a difficult choice to make,” Neo commented.

“I know it is, but it’s one that seems to be working out pretty well,” the doctor explained. “I’ve had some male patients that were suffering depression over a year ago. To them, they just felt that they couldn’t find a woman at all or were just hopeless in the endeavor. With this whole alliance, many of them have taken up the UWAN dating, and it served as a cure for their depression. They found happiness and joy with these women. The same could be used in reverse. Many of these women have been lonely with the loss of their former husbands. The Itreans, at least from what I can see with the T’rintar clan members, suffered a similar form of depression. Some of them even suffer from PTSD too. Again, I’m not the one to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do. My goal is to try to help guide you to a path that will lead you down a better road, a road that will make you happy.”

Neo knew that there wasn’t much more that the psychologist could offer. The medications that he took were no longer working as they should, and he had to look at everything from a different view now. He remained hesitant on the idea and would place the idea on hold. For now, he still had to consider other things, including the events of today.

“I don’t like what is going to happen after today,” Neo explained. “I practically snapped at pedestrian, Itrean or not. My reputation has been damaged, and it might even endanger my future as a racer.”

The doctor smiled at him. “I’ll tell you what. I saw a little bit of everything that happened. I know of the situation that you’re going through. I can try to help speak out on your behalf. Of course, you still have to go out and apologize for everything but be honest with them. You’re a veteran, and the population would understand that. Maybe they’ll still let you go into Oshun-500 and UWALVR for this year.”

“Somehow, I doubt that,” Neo commented as he showed much hesitation. “This whole year is one big experiment that is affecting the whole racing competitions. UWALVR and Oshun-500, they are letting the Itreans race.”

“Really?” Frenry inquired.

“Yeah. It is the whole ‘Spirit of the alliance’ idea. They want to have the T’rintar clan participate in some of the things we do. Supposedly, they have their own races on their worlds, and well ... they want to have them be a part of ours.”

“Interesting. Even I haven’t heard of it.”

“Only a few racers are really supposed to know about all of this. They will ... surprise the audience and let everyone know. Technically I shouldn’t be telling you all of this.”

“Well, in that case, you have Doctor-patient confidentiality to help you out on that. My lips are sealed.”

Neo took a deep breath. He closed his eyes as he now had to reconsider everything that was going to happen in his future. The doctor confided him.

“I know that the hospital has discharged you. As far as I see it, you are well enough to return back home. If you feel like you need to come back, just let us know. I can also try to...”

“No ... it’s alright, Doctor Fenrey. I think it will be alright,” Neo commented as he tapped his leg to the carpet. “I think that I’ll be alright.”

“You will be alright. I’m always here if you need my help.”

“Thank you,” Neo said with a half-hearted smile.

It had been later that afternoon as Neo sat on the couch of his small-scale apartment. By now, the night lights were starting to kick in for the great city, but he had no interest in seeing it. He, instead, was looking at his large display screen in his living room.

The place itself was not remarkable but not bad to look at when it came to the home. It was spacious enough for the living room to have a couple of pieces of furniture, but that was it. There was one partial benefit that he did have, however. It was the bottom floor and had direct access to the garage where his motorcycle had been delivered back to him.

For now, Neo had no interest in even looking at his vehicle. Instead, he had been issuing out messages from his tablet to social media websites. He knew that was more important than a lot of things now. Even if he lost a race, he knew that he had to approach the public at a generous pace. By the time he had finished eating and spoken to his agent, he had to sit back and catch his breath.

For a moment, he had no interest in watching what might be on, but he had to see what was going to happen eventually. He tuned in to watch Oshun Prime, one of the more prominent news media outlets for the colony. On the screen, the news lady, a woman with shoulder-long dyed blue hair and a fairly dark complexion, was standing as she addressed the camera that was recording her.

“I wonder when she will finally leave and come to my place,” Neo commented as he looked at the news broadcast. He almost seemed enamored with this individual. His eyes would often go towards her reasonably large breasts, that she used a black dress to cover them.

With that said, the anchorwoman’s name of Nia Kolsen appeared on the bottom screen. Her big smile was something that seemed to make the man happy. There was a ticker-tape of minor news reports that appeared that ran across underneath the name. The background was a little bit different than Neo remembered with other news agencies. It would often show a radiating variety of colors of neon lights. Behind the anchorwoman would be recorded film footage of previous events or whatever topics were being brought up.

“In the news today,” the anchorwoman said with an adorable voice. “Love and Robots. We will discuss our interview with Doctor Ericson and how he managed to create an AI, his future wife, and become a father. We will discuss the moral and ethical concerns that such an event has brought forth onto the UWA. Another topic is Neo Kekoa, a veteran racer that apparently had a spat with one of his fans. Is the racing committee going to allow such acts of discontent? Will Neo be removed from all future races?”

“Ugh...” Neo commented with a mild aggravation. “Not a good start.” He shook his head in disbelief. He already knew that the news media was going to blow the events that happened to him into a wide fervor.

“We will get to the first discussion of topics, and that is what has transpired in the Oshun-500 races.” The display showed an overhead view of the races as Neo could see his motorcycle pulled over. It then cut to him getting out. He could feel the mild form of humiliation as he could see the people were looking around him in confusion. It then cut to him mouthing off at the Shal’rein woman.

“According to the race officials,” the anchorwoman continued. “This was the final qualifying race in which all the racers competed to reach the Oshun-500 races. The tough racing matches were close, with Meifen taking first place, Oluchi taking a close second place, and Adrian taking third. All of these racers will be going for the Oshun-500 championships and the UWALVR racing competitions scheduled for next week. However, the event was not without the bombastic attitude that was brought forth from Neo who verbally assaulted a member of the T’rintar clan.”

The feed from the news did switch over to show a paused recording from Neo himself. This time it was something that he sent over to the news agencies to play. It was his counterargument to help defuse the recent set of events, or at least he hoped it would.

“According to Neo, he did suffer from a nervous breakdown during the race and regretted his actions. We will now playback what he sent to us.”

The recording was made there in his home. It had Neo as he showed a hint of sympathy on the recording.

“I wanted to offer my formal apologies for what I had told that Shal’rein woman,” the recording stated. “I suffer from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder that was caused when I served in the Battle of Oshun. It had literally costed a leg that I lost and have been given an artificial one in return. The events with the races and the fact that I had an augmented leg that wasn’t working correctly had caused me to have a severe panic attack. I can assure you that to the woman that I verbally assaulted that I was not in the right frame of mind. I didn’t mean any harm, and I’m truly sorry for what I said. With that said, I hope to be able to continue racing and offer my support to the racing team in whatever enquires that they may have.”

The recording ended as it went back to the anchorwoman. There was a hint of sympathy on her face as if she did agree with it. Although Neo wondered how much of it was staged. They played most of the message, at least.

“We have also received a further statement from Neo’s Doctor to help verify this claim,” Nia said. “According to the racing officials, they have stated that they find the situation to be an isolated incident and will not engage in any action against Neo. For Neo, we hope to see you again in the following months of Oshun’s racing.”

There was a sense of relief, at least for Neo to hear that. He could at least know that he was still going to continue his racing career. For now, he had time, and the thoughts seemed to sink in more and more as the anchorwoman continued her broadcast. The screen switched over to depict that of a robotic cat woman. It also showed a blue artificial face. For a split second, Neo almost wondered what they were going to talk about until it dawned on him that they were talking about the incident from Minerva that happened on Mars. He didn’t care about it and already knew about the story. He clicked a button on his tablet as he shut the display monitor in his room off.

“Good...” Neo said as he sighed. “Not going to worry about it anymore tonight. Too much shit for today ... too much of ... everything.”

Neo felt like closing his eyes as he laid back on his couch. He had a sense of peace that resided with him even with the brief flashbacks of his mental breakdown on the track.

“It happens...,” he remarked. “Happened at the worst time ... shit ... I was doing so well.”

He looked in the living room. He could already see the small number of awards that lined his small table. Racing certificates, a shut-off 3D picture frame projector, and medals resided as they were collecting a tiny amount of dust on them. Yet, looking at the awards at least brought a small amount of happiness to his mind.

“Maybe, Doctor Fenrey is right after all,” he continued speaking to himself. He reached over and picked up the photo projector and debated about turning it on. He already knew that there wouldn’t be much to look upon that he already knew about. It was missing something that was growing more and more as he considered it.

“Only child in the family,” he continued. “My parents will pass on, and it will only be me. No generation ... nothing to continue on my legacy.” He sighed again. “I want to be a father. I think that I should go ahead and put a pause on everything. Maybe it’s time to start looking into finding a woman to date or get married to.”

Neo placed the small disk-like picture projector back onto the table and picked up his tablet. He then sat comfortably as he was connected to the UWAN. The glory of the internet services of the UWA was there for him. Anything was available at his fingertips that he wanted to search up. It only grew even more once the T’rintar clan became an ally. He started typing buttons as he began his search queries.

“They must have had a hassle in trying to integrate their networks with ours,” Neo commented as he typed up “Itrean Dating” to wait for the results.

What popped up on his screen was too much for his tablet screen to show. It outright shocked him as numerous results were revealed. One webpage was labeled “Human/Itrean Mate Finder.” Another one was labeled “Hot Yutilian Women Seeking Love.” Finally, there was one that was called “Go Swimming with Shark-Babes Tonight.” The results were endless.

For a minute, Neo was intensely debating about this. In one sense, he almost felt a mild form of embarrassment. The T’rintar clan were looking for human bachelors, alright. It was like opening the door to a treasure trove of alien women that were all seeking a companion and lover. He often wondered how the media would look upon him in dating or going out with one of these women, but at the same time, he was looking for a companion just as it was implied. Regardless, the number of results that had popped up amounted to thousands upon thousands of websites. A part of him even wondered if the human race had something new to worry about, and that was being conquered by an alien race and having the men taken to be made into ... unwilling husbands. But, of course, the logical side of him already concluded that it had to be false because if that were the case, then it would have happened already by now. From not only the Battle of Oshun, the other Itrean clans still seemed to be quite violent and life-threatening as well.

Regardless, when he looked at his augmented leg, it served as a permanent reminder to be cautious in this approach. Even the term “The enemy of my enemy is my friend” didn’t sit perfectly when it came to the newfound alien allies. These women could be up to something. He could still remember the media outlet’s paranoid talking heads, which stated that the T’rintar clan women could be infiltrators and were working their way into human society. Of course, even those claims didn’t wholly make sense either. Some of the ones he had seen were starting to have growing pregnant bellies from their newfound human husbands. If anything, it showed that they were serious in this manner. The power these Itreans had was the fact that they outright outnumbered the human race altogether. The dinosaurs of the former Earth had a very long time to expand in the galaxy. Their numbers could easily consume the UWA a hundred times over. It was a mystery why the Shal’rein didn’t launch more ships into Oshun as it was. Another fleet and the Shal’rein clan would have outright conquered Oshun. The Aksren clan already had Cipra in their hands as it was. The UHN and the UWA were hopelessly outnumbered and outgunned. Only the T’rintar clan stood in its way of complete annihilation. Finally, he had to relent.

“Dating and marrying an alien...” Neo said to himself. “It’s come down to this, hasn’t it? I have the ability to go out with most of the women on Oshun, but instead, I’m looking at this. I guess it’s time to go ahead and jump down this hole and see if there is a light at the end of the tunnel.”